Sunday, September 25, 2016

Wedding Planning Pt.3

 Image courtesy of the Internet
Image courtesy of the Internet
The Dreaded Wedding Dress Shop Visit
Firstly, I feel that I should tell you that I am not a girly girl, I like pretty things, I am a magpie with sparkly things, but I do not generally covet clothes; hats? yes; dresses? no. Therefore I am not really sure why I thought that I would walk into a dress shop and fall head over heels in love with one, to the point where I want to spend £1000+, especially for one day's wear.
My initial plan was to spend around £300-500 on a dress, which I can adapt for everyday use afterwards. Although, I always assumed it would be £300 over £500...I'm such a cheapskate, but I think the real problem is that I know the worth of things, so I can justify £600+ on a handmade dress made in Britain, but not necessarily one which is mass made in a factory; working behind the scenes of fashion has ruined me.
On Saturday, I went to a lovely shop filled with gorgeous 50's style dresses, a welcoming environment and the staff were a dream. It was an incredible experience and for them to break my 'Wedding Dress Virginity' was a huge compliment to me. They are extremely accommodating and have a lovely selection. All of their dresses are made within the UK and most sections can be interchanged and made from various colours and materials. It was amazing and I did love some of the dresses, however I felt underwhelmed and indifferent about the entire experience, which in itself felt very uncomfortable. My friends were gushing but never once did I think 'yes, this is it'. 
Due to this I felt like a weirdo, as though something was terribly wrong with me...stupid I know, but when you see other women bursting into tears and brimming with excitement, it makes you wonder whether you're wired incorrectly. My friends who were present celebrated on cue, however I didn't feel it. One of them is married and other is non-plus by the concept, and it was amazing having them with me, but I never once felt that 'whoosh' of nerves or emotion. And it felt awful, I felt bad for the person in the shop, was I supposed to be more brimming, or does she just know how people behave and therefore I'm completely normal...maybe she trusts me more, as I am quieter? Who knows? It is such a foreign scenario.
Having finished the experience and coming to the realisation that I'm not willing to part with £1200 for a dress, regardless of the occasion. They are well worth it, absolutely gorgeous, and if it was within my budget, I probably wouldn't think anything of it, however it isn't and I won't pretend it is.
Afterwards, while speaking with one of my bridesmaids, she admitted that she also felt relatively dead inside while trying on her dresses and how she ended up picking the dress that she liked, with an appropriate price tag and suitable for a Thai wedding. All of a sudden I felt normal. I didn't feel like a leper and we agreed that Film and TV play a huge part in creating this ridiculous farce that every girl spends her life dreaming of that perfect dress...I never did, I spent my life dreaming of a great guy who cares a shit ton about me. The dress just serves a purpose, and that purpose is to ensure that I am not naked on my wedding day.
One of my bridesmaids came over the other night to flick through some Wedding magazines I'd been given and we were both aghast at the price of some undies: £900 for a bra, knickers and robe, you could have matching shoes but they were 'price on application', now that is some crazy talk. If you are going to be spending that much on your under garments, what the hell are you spending on your dress? And if I was to spend that much on undies, I'd want them to be the most bloody comfortable things in the world, which are accompanied with a chauffeur to wipe my bum for a month, and I would wear them to work as my outer garments.
---
A week later, I received a message from the shop offering me 50% anything in stock, so off I set to visit again. I ending up spending £180 over my revised budget, however I've made a saving of £330 (original pricing given to me), or £660 (based on the revised pricing I was given in the shop). Either way, I'm slightly over but have a dress, so that can be ticked off my list.
Having completed that task, I still feel terribly indifferent about it. My dress is lovely and just as I imagined it would be, however it is just a dress. Friends are lovely, kind and positive about it when they see a picture but I find it impossible to get truly excited.
But, I am excited about the entire day: from music we will have playing, the friends and family will be get to see and celebrate with, and the food we get to devour. I guess there are some girls who pine for dresses and other who dream of food, dancing and playlists.

Sunday, September 11, 2016

Apple blinking technology

 Image courtesy of the internet
Dearest Apple, you really are a bunch of imbeciles!
I thought it was bad enough when you decided you were bigger than the government who you don't pay taxes too...however, this is a whole new level of moronic programming.
You replaced my screen in April, as I dropped my phone and smashed it, I sat at the "genius bar" for over an hour, even though I had a scheduled appointment...it was eventually dealt with and off I went again with my newly fixed phone and £100 lighter!
However, last weekend my phone screen decided to become intermittently unresponsive just before I took a long journey, "great, I thought, this is handy being in the wilderness and not having a phone to rely on as I drive around but you know, we all coped up until the invention of car and mobile phones, so I can walk to the SOS phones which line the motorways and dual carriageways of Britain. No biggy!".
I finally reach my next destination and thought I'll hard reset my phone to see if it's a temporary blip. It wasn't, so I decided to book in to the "genius bar" for when I returned to London next week...however, when reporting to the Apple Store booking form that my phone was unresponsive and I wanted an appointment, the only way to confirm the appointment was to type in a verification code, however my phone was unresponsive and I couldn't input my code to unlock the phone, so couldn't see any text messages coming in. Which is pretty dumb. I wrote a sarcastic comment on Facebook about it and hoped my phone would eventually wake up and do what it's supposed too. It did, thankfully, however by that time I remembered that there is no point in booking an appointment, as I'll be waiting around for over an hour anyway...
Then this evening, back in London, I felt that I should do a complete reset of the unit, in case it is software issue, not a hardware issue. I had my partner's trusty Macbook to hand. Why his and not mine? As you've made my First Generation Macbook (still going strong and with plenty of capability), obsolete, as it's too old and therefore you're hoping that I'll buy a new one from you (fyi, I won't. And I'm really stuck between a rock and a hard place, as I hate Microsoft and you the same amount now-a-days, and don't think either of you deserve my hard earned money).
So, here I am computer up and running, and I realise that it's probably going to be better if I recover my phone contents from my iCloud, as that is why it's is there and you constantly sent irritating 'too full' messages in regards to it. So off I go (by the way, this is what it looks like to reset a phone from iCloud without other 'devices' to hand):
Hello - swipe right to reset
Language?
Country?
Setup a code?
Wifi?
Restore options
iCloud Sign in
Enter verification code that we've sent to your device, which you're setting up and can not access until the set up is complete.
Did not get a verification code?
Code options?
Enter all your details in and give us another mobile phone number for us to send a code to? GAME OVER
I have tried since to use my partners phone, but low and behold his is locked to a separate network, as the phone networks are as tight as every bloody company afraid of healthy competition.
Then "lightbulb moment", login to my iCloud account and change my number. Nope, as my iCloud account is now locked until my verification code has been entered...so.......
Fine, I shall back up from iTunes to a back up from February and then I will lose 7 months worth of back up, as my phone will update my iCloud and delete everything since February: GREAT!!!
Then I think, 'Apple can not be that stupid, surely, it must be me', maybe I can get a phone call with the code, even though I have not setup my phone properly...yes, I can, oh my golly this is great. Oh no, what's that Apple my iCloud has no back ups and I need to back up from iTunes (February) or setup as a new phone. Maybe, it's because my iCloud account is locked, so I unlock it and try again. Oh no, that's right, I have no iCloud back up what so ever, even though before I started this godly awful process, my phone told me it was backing up to iCloud and up to date - cheers technology!
Now, I am stuck living in February 2016, on the upside the scourge of 2016 hasn't started yet; Bowie is still dead but this seems to be the worse thing to have happened this year so far.
30 minutes later...
In fact, iTunes has loaded my partner's phone backup and won't let me do anything on my handset without putting in his Apple password, which means I'm not living in February 2016, I'm living as though I've never had an iPhone...I think I joined on generation three. That shows me for sticking with one bunch of arseholes, over others for the last ten years or so!
Now I'm trying to sign in to my Apple account within iTunes to see if my profile will setup from it (yep, clutching at straws) and your demanding that I enter a verification code which you haven't sent! This is beyond a joke. I just want a phone which works and does what it is supposed to, how is that SO hard? Also, isn't it my choice if I want a slow computer: none of this bollocks happened when I could regularly back up to my computer, but no, my iPhone won't see my Macbook, you "Mary Poppins 'penny pinching' bunch of bankers"!!!
I'm officially sobbing over the most stupid of things, as you've broken me! I am sobbing that my entire communicational existence (yep, pathetic I know) has just gone in the blink of an eye. This is ridiculous! I want to crawl out of my sobbing body as I hate myself for being like this but you've worn me down, I can't take it anymore...I feel disgusted with myself but I'm too exhausted to care...I just want this endless situation resolved and a phone which works (I was trying to help, as if this screen issue persists, you'll ask me irritating questions like 'have you restored your phone?', 'have you performed a hard reset?' 'have you called your Mum today?').
Therefore, in my final statement of the most emotionally challenging restore of a device known to man: I have reset my phone as new and loaded my iCloud, which had most things other than the last week, and any text messages (all of my messages of the last decade have gone), as have my notes (inclusive of my potential wedding vows, oops) but I feel that it is cleansing, for when I move away from Apple I wouldn't be able to keep them anyway...it has actually helped. Really it has. Therefore, thank you Apple for helping make my future transistion away from you much easier.
24 hours later...
And my screen has become unresponsive again. At least I can now tell the 'Genius Bar' that it's not software related. Although, I still have to visit the bloody place, great!