Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Bruno

Tonight, I sobbed!
I sobbed more than I have since my heart got broken for the first time. I sobbed more tonight, than I did in 2005! Tonight was a night, it had so many highs but one of the most depressing lows of all times, and if back during 2005 someone had told me I wouldn't sob that much until 2009, I would have sobbed my heart out ten times more!

This weekend, I lost a good friend. A loyal, funny kind of guy. A charming, adorable, loving kind of guy. The kind of guy who makes a rainy day seem ok. The kind of guy who makes a quiet night in the pub, an unwasted night. The kind of guy who is just happy to exist!

This guy, random as it is to say, it is a dog! But he was more than that and will always represent more than that. When I found out the devastating news yesterday, after phoning his mum and dad, I phoned my best friend. She's always been a dog person (I have not), maybe that is what makes this the more profound, he was the dog who made me like dogs. He (I should use his name, no matter how much it hurts), Bruno, was that dog, the dog! The only dog. The gentle giant, the kind, considerate, understanding fellow, who made the complexities in life seem so juvenile,

I first met Bruno in 2004 at a birthday party. I was weary, he was a rottweiler, I was a simple human, his jaws could rip me limb to limb, my simple jaws could talk the ass off a donkey! I soon met him on a one to one level, when I went to work in his pub and he made me fall in love with dogs. Bruno made me want to own my own dog. He was calm and accepting and moody, don't get me wrong, he could strop his arse off but it was all apart of his character but most of all, he was respectful and loving, kind and considerate, entertaining, protective and amazing! He was Bruno and only Bruno, he was nothing more or less but he was perfect, beautiful and oh so loving!

I haven't fully accepted that Bruno has departed from this world. I guess tomorrow night when I enter work and he never barks for me to let him upstairs, maybe it'll settle in, Maybe when I forget for a second and I ask if he needs to go out or maybe when I tell the customers to not feed the dog, no matter how hungry he makes himself look, it'll truly sink in, who knows?! I guess time will tell. I've been crying for over two hours now, I'm not sure if these are tears for Bruno or just tears because I can?! I'm pretty sure they are all for him (which is more random than you'll ever know, as 5 years ago, I'd never believe anything could make me feel this miserable) but Bruno wasn't just anything, he was a good friend. And right now all my thoughts are directed at Lianne and Tom and for the loss of their good friend, child even.
Bruno is and always will be the reason I like dogs. He will always hold a little doggy space in my heart, as he made me realise that dogs are more than pets. I finally get that dogs are friends, companions and members of the family. And Bruno was all of those things to myself (as well as to others) and more. Bruno, you'll be missed more than you'll ever know! x

Friday, December 11, 2009

Melinda Gordon

I've been watching 'Ghost Whisperer' for a while now, "yeah I watch really bad American TV, so what?!".

But, Melinda tells at least 2-3 people every episode about her "ability". Seeing how people gossip, surely now that we're in the 5th series most of the town know about her ability. People gossip loads, especially in small towns. Everyone should know about it, and she runs a small shop in town, there should be loads of finger pointing and hushed whispers but apparently not. People still seem genuinely surprised when she tells them. Even though, she spends hours talking to herself in the main square, in plain view of everyone.

Or is there a small clause with her helping them, that they then have to leave the town and never mention it to anyone ever again?

Or is it like 'Murder She Wrote', where they all know she's the kiss of death, but still feel a desire to be her friend!

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Dorothy Parker

A new favourite quote: “If you want to see what God thinks of money, just look at all the people He gave it to”.

Friday, November 27, 2009

Arctic Charm

Nick Grimshaw was right, this is a charming little video!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Lookalikes

I've finally worked out what it is that Natalie Portman reminds me of.
Don't get me wrong, I think she is stunning. She doesn't feature in my list (it's very small, only has three people on it) of girls I'd go gay for but, she's striking and a bloody good actress to boot!

But...





Might explain why I like Meerkats and also, why I like Natalie Portman?!

Colin

I forgot to blog about this film a while ago. I had seen about it online ages ago and finally had the chance to watch it. I originally had it on my Lovefilm list, which is possibly the longest list to ever have existed but got the chance to watch it on Tv and I wasn't disappointed!

I watched it with two lovely ladies, one of whom isn't a big horror fan, well that is an understatement, she fucking hates them! And one who appreciates a good scare and none of us were let down!

It's budget! More budget than ever before, it cost £45 to make, as everyone offered their time and the editing/production was done in the directors spare time but none of that detracts from the fact that it's good!
I'm not going to spoil it, just watch it. It's so good! Trailer below, in case you haven't seen it.



Got tickled by this yesterday:
My boss was talking to my other boss on the phone about a band yesterday and described them as "That band who wear feathers in their hair",
He looked at me and said "Pippa, what are they called, you know, they wear feathers?",
"I've no idea, what do they sing?"
"Oh, they sing those happy, dance songs, oh they supported The Heads last year in Manchester",
"Oh, MGMT".
Of all the way to describe MGMT, this is the last thing I'd think of. Hence my being tickled!
Although, this is the guy who calls all bands recording in the studio "My Left Foot", he might be a genius but I didn't say that!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Watchmen

Finally watched Watchmen, no I haven't read the graphic novel but yes I love a superhero based anything!

I got a little excited about it when it came out, but not excited enough to get off my arse and travel to the cinema to pay £7 to see it (although let's be fair, with snacks too - it would have cost a good £15 - remember I'm a fat girl in a thin girls body).
Anyhow, I finally saw it. The Chicken had purchased it and I finally got to view the masterpiece. In the similar light to other graphic novels turned films (Sin City being a prime example), it has the charming cartoon-esque quality to a T. I am smitten!

I guess if I'd bothered to get off my arse and read the book, I'd have more to say on the actual adaptation, alas I do not! So I will say, I enjoyed it, thought it was well executed and no, I didn't think it was too long, not by a milestone, especially as I assume the alternative would have been to 'two part' it and that would have been shit!


In other news, I finally have to accept that sleep is required and I should not party on painkillers, apparently my behaviour was interesting at our dinner party on Sunday night ("Sunday" I hear you cry, well it is the new black!), maybe even on par with the "evening of wall licking", which is saying something and is still the reason why I do not drink Tuaca!
But this all sucks, as it was the three parties last weekend that made me ill in the first place but I'm still not sure how singing The Boss and G'n'R until 4.30am makes a 'lost voice' turn in to a 'throat infection' which then develops in to 'vertigo' which then transforms to 'ickly throat and strange cough' that sounds like a dogs bark!!!
Although last Friday I did sound very much as though Chewbacca* and Darth Vadar had a kid and that was kind of cool, if not really irritating, as we all know how much I enjoy talking!

Oh and talking of Star Wars, I'm loving how ITV are playing all 6 films in chronological order according to the storyline, it's rather charming. Thankfully we're now on the ones I grew up with, it's like being 7 again, although I don't have my brothers pretending to be Jedi's and trying to constantly kill me.

P.S. Chewbacca isn't in Blogger' automatic spellcheck - shocking!

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Diamonds of blood

I finally watched Blood Diamond last night, oh my god, if I wanted to see such destruction and devastation I'd watch the news.
I'm also thinking that the characters Danny and Solomon are lucky that the children's gun training was so bad, otherwise they'd have been killed much earlier in the film.
It's good, if you like: mass death, destruction, lots of explosions, South African accents and running. If not, then I'd leave it be.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Scarefest

This looks pretty bloody great!!!

Let the scaring commence...

Mind The Gap

Apparently Gap is using the greetings "Happy Whateveryouwannukah" this year.
Personally, loving it!

Sorry, how do I know you?

I had an uninteresting blog written, celebrating my 200th entry but alas, the world of Facebook has offered something that has distracted me and makes me want to write.

I went to school in a town, it's not a small town but a lot of the people in it are small minded. A good percentage of them went to school because it beat hanging around the park and also, so they could meet loose members of the opposite sex and get laid. Sounds great, well it was!
In typical fashion, the 'cool kids' weren't cool at all. They were generally unintelligent and resorted to their fists or gobs to get places. Don't get me wrong, I knew some of them and they were nice, it's just they had no real aspirations to go anywhere or do anything. I didn't have many aspirations but at least I was aware that the world outside of the town and the county existed, yeah I guess I'm a snob.

Now at heart, most of the people in my year at school were nice. I mean, most people are nice at heart but some were ignorant and it was the ignorance that made school hard at times. I have known who I was from quite an early age, I knew why I did things and what I thought about a lot of things, I guess I knew most of this stuff by the age of leaving primary school. I'm not saying I haven't changed, I have but my basic foundations, are the same. I've adapted at times but never truly changed the core. A lot of the kids in my year didn't like this fact, well in fact, they just didn't like me.

I loved going to school and learning. I wasn't a great pupil, I was pig-headed, stubborn, occasionally insolent and a chatter box but I did enjoy those particular classes and tried to show the level of respect to those teachers (although I failed numerous times. Some of which still haunt me). But I hated a lot of the kids in my year. They generally made my life a misery. I'd never let them know this but they did, I guess this is where I got my ability to ignore people and carry on as though it's not effecting me, 'best not to let them know they've got to me' attitude.

I'm friends with people from school, I don't even think about whether I went to school with these people (a lot of them I lost contact with and then gained a friendship some years later), they are my friends. When I meet people whom I attended school with, I see them as the individuals that they are. Some are lovely people and others 'aren't for me'. We haven't seen each other in over 10 years, there should be a lot of change, if not, at least some. But this still doesn't mean I want to actively go and meet them?! I spotted on Facebook earlier today an invite to a school reunion. Could you imagine doing anything worse?! Personally, I can not.

I instantly emailed my best friend (who also attended this school, with the following comment):
Could you imagine the chats: "oh your single and without children, how do you wake up every morning?",
"late in the morning, mildly hung-over with an extremely attractive man, sore from a great night of 'fun times', with lots of money in my bank and the freedom to do as I please, when I please. How do you cope with a ugly, over weight unfaithful partner and horrid children who suck your energy and money from you?"


Don't get me wrong, I've friends with children and I love them and that lifestyle is perfect for them and one day, it'll be perfect for me but right now, I don't see why I'd subject myself to possibly feel as I did during my teen years and have people try and get me to justify my lifestyle decisions.
It's bad enough that I constantly get 'friend requests' from people whom I haven't spoken to for over 10 years, let alone being in a room with all of them.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Singles Karma Sutra


Something for us singles out there to enjoy!

Friday, November 06, 2009

Geeky Fact

My friends on facebook can skip this entry, which means no one will then read it, oh well?!

According to the director of this advert, it took more firework explosives to create this advert, than were used in the making of Saving Private Ryan!!!



And on that note, the marketing crew of Bravia are very talented people, every one of their adverts is beautifully executed!
I wasn't going to embed this advert but it still blows my mind. They were only allowed one attempt to film this advert and once again, magnificent!

Thursday, November 05, 2009

Target Women

I think Sarah Haskins great, she says exactly what we are all thinking!
Here are a few videos for your pleasure...


Online Dating


Disney Princesses


Chick Flicks


Hot Chicks


Contraptions

Shake Weight



Wait until about 28 seconds in!!!

Friday, October 30, 2009

Hallos eve

It's Halloween tomorrow!!! I'm a fan of dressing up. I got a little peed off with doing so for a year or two but I'm back in to loving it now! I've been failing with organisation but always seem to be able to pull last minute outfits off.

In the past at Halloween I've been:
A zombie Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz,
an 80's prom attendee,
Half man/half woman,
Wonder Woman,
one of the Fame kids,
Amy Winehouse,
and a slitted throat corpse.


I saw this great set of costumes recently online. It wasn't these photos but another, which was done a little better. Anyhow, I thought it would be pretty easy to do. Although being covered head to toe in black is appealing, walking around with a board on my back, isn't so much. I think I'm now going to attend as an American geek/nerd. I just need some braces and a pocket protector!
Photos will follow.

Tip Toes

As of January 1st, I will no longer be a permanent member of 'the pub across town's' work force! I moved over there with Lianne, Tom and Bruno in August 2007 and have worked there at least 2 days a week since.
I told Tom and Lianne on Wednesday night that I was leaving, I couldn't contain my tears. I've been seeing these guys every week for over 2 years, and as of January 1st, it'll be a lot less. It's a sad thing but not the end, I'll help out occasionally and they are my friends, so will be making trips to hang out. It will be weird though, I've been pulling pints for 9 years. The most I've had out of doing so is 6 months. I bet I'll get itchy to be behind the bar soon enough, hence my helping out occasionally, to keep my pint pulling blood flowing.
Although now I'll get some more me time, which is exciting. As much as I love working and hanging out there, the idea of sleeping and socialising more, is extremely appealing. Might start properly living my life.

I've been thinking, I had my palm read a while back, I wrote about it on here. She told me that I'd already met the bloke I was going to be spend the rest of my life with. If so, who the hell is it? That is one scary thought!

Humphrey was sent this on the book and it looks so godly awful and yet so good!
I'm surprised that I've not seen anything about it until now.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Film title misread

I thought I just saw a film called 'Bad Tenant'. Doesn't it sounds awful?
I might write it and prove to myself how bad it would be!

Singles Holidays

Recently my posts have been a bit shit! Short and sweet with no point or long winded and dull with lots of points but with no actual specific point.

Last weekend I went to Cornwall with some friends. I adore Cornwall, it used to be where we holidayed as a family, when I was really young. It holds a special place in my heart, Cornwall is like no where else, they have their own laws and ways of life, it's such a charming incredible place and the people are great too.
We spent 4 nights and days there and it was gorgeous. Exactly what I needed. Being single makes going away a nightmare. You either go away alone, with a friend or a group of you. But organising friends is harder than it should be due to social lives and work, and finding somewhere you all like is difficult. When you're in a relationship, it's so much easier, it's one other person to organise, especially as you both have similar goals and preferences on holiday. I guess, I've been using my status as an excuse not to go away, due to the hassle. Although the one time I did go away with a boyfriend, I ended up sorting everything and it was a massive headache. Maybe I just don't really like holidays?

Anyhow, all you need to know is that Polzeath was incredible, lots of fun. No pre-organised fun or events, just lots and lots of chill out time.

Since then it's been hectic, hellish and crap! The guy who was meant to be moving in to our spare room lost his job, so isn't moving in now. We've got 3 weeks to fill it?! ARGH! Placing ads all over Gumtree and Facebook, to no avail. Although some friends have been passing on our details. I'm sure it'll all come about, I'm a positive person who tries not to panic in these stressful moments, everything always works out for the best, this situation will too, I'm sure.
We had a Polski called Pete look around at the weekend and he was very funny and laid back, I've my fingers crossed.

Hopefully this week will be calmer. A few more nights off for once maybe?! I've so much stuff to do and no time. Maybe by Christmas I'll have succeeded.

Plus, I noticed the other day that I've two new freckles, one right in the middle of my left cheek and one near my right elbow. It's so funny discovering new freckles, I always wonder if they just appear over night or darken over time? I've never seen them slowly arrive. I kind of love the idea of them just appearing over night, like a crazy magic trick!

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Happy Christmas Mac

I love the Mac vs PC adverts, not so sure about the new one about Windows 7, slightly cheap shots if you ask me but alas, this one makes me smile.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Got Milk!

These are from French magazine, Milk. I'm loving these kids. They are all far too cool. Wish I had also attended their cool school, then I might have been this cool




Wish I was as geek-chic as these too!





















Wish I looked this cool hanging out on a wall.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Grayson & Philippa Perry


I love this photo, Grayson & Philippa Perry are just far too cute!

Friday, October 09, 2009

I'm sorry to myself

I owe myself an apology. I said something rather out of order about myself, at the time I believed it to be true but I'd been blind sighted by rumours, gossip and unknowledgeable comments.

I'd never describe myself as a feminist, I'm not sure why?! I guess it's because
a) within my generation it's kind of a dirty word (when I first met my friend Lou, she told me she'd studied feminism at university. I instantly had visions of shapeless dresses, birkenstocks, copious amounts of body hair, etc. I didn't think "oh she stands for women's rights, equal treatment and the right to be a woman, without any pre-conceived ideas applied).
b) I was raised by a strong independent woman and a strong independent man with two older brothers and was constantly told "it's different for you, you're a girl".
& c) In my teen years I spent most of my time being the pretty girl's friend and hanging out with guys, I guess being a guy more than anything. Due to the typical conversations, etc, I've a more male attitude towards relationships and therefore have been more harmful to the ladies of this world with generalised sexiest comments.
But I guess I am a feminist, maybe not the burning bra kind but at heart I am. I believe in equal rights and being able to do anything a man can. I appreciate the fact I've been born in this era and have these opportunities.

Anyway, onwards with my apology. This is all relevant, so bear with me.
Recently I accused myself of having been crazy during one particular break up and compared to my other break ups, I definitely acted out of character. But as my old housemates reminded me, I had just cause.

A few years ago, I started seeing a guy. Nothing too heavy, just something fun. We'd been emailing each other for a few months. We'd befriended each other about 2-3 months before his long term relationship broke up.
For the first month we chatted about everyday stuff, views and interests (it was never really personal information). Most weekends he'd visit the nightclub I worked in and we'd hang out. His relationship broke down and I helped him through it by giving him apt distractions. Slowly over time our friendship grew and some how it developed to be more than just friends. Unfortunately it was only a month or two after his relationship had finalised. It wasn't ideal, far from it, but life presents and you have to make a decision, I chose to go with it and see what happened.
We dated for a short while. It was mildly stressed due to his main social group being his exes' social group, but most of them were polite and understanding towards me, even under the extremely awkward circumstances. I started to feel insecure and started to pressurise him in to labeling what we were. A few months later, He informed his ex and she was upset, which was to be expected. Shortly after, he finished it. I wasn't surprised. That night I went to his local and got drunk with my friends and him, I wanted him to know there were no hard feelings. We remained friendly and shortly afterwards we started sleeping together again. He'd call at 2am after a night out and I'd let him stay the night, he'd then stop all contact for a week or two and then it would repeat. This continued for a few months, I wanted to feel pretty and desired (I had issues from a previous break up of my mine, which made me feel worthless, so I valued myself at 0.00p). He could make me feel beautiful, intelligent and funny within seconds. When he'd stay, he'd tell me everything I wanted to hear, without making any actual promises, I read into everything he said and laced it all with large dollops of hope.
After this had gone on for a while, it stopped abruptly.

I got confused and started acting up, after everything I didn't feel as though I deserved that! I would text him a couple of messages destined for friends, so he'd know what was going on in my life. I'd try to call and text him while drunk and other various stupid acts, like leaving messages on his friends social networking pages, etc.
He started a new relationship with someone else and I moved on (not that, at that time, I was as in to him. It's just similar situations are easier than new ones, or more desirable than nothing).
A couple of months later, I had moved house, and I saw him out at a gig. We'd become amicable again. He came over for a chat, I was mildly drunk, feeling good about myself and having not had much male attention of late, I propositioned him. Stupid I know (isn't hind sight a marvellous thing), at the time I thought "well, if you don't ask, you never know?". He turned me down and I had a great night regardless.
He managed to allow me to be an idiot, without any consequences. I'm pretty sure we stayed distant friends. We'd say hi if we saw each other (I don't really remember), and then I went away to NZ for a month. During which, I'd officially been dumped as a friend, social network deletion, no message, nothing, just blankness, I accepted this and said nothing. Since then, if I see him I generally ignore him as though he's a stranger, in my eyes it's the most respectable way to behave, there is no reason to make a scene. All of the above was so long ago that it's not even relevant, he's changed and so have I, we aren't who we were.

The point is that in context, my actions don't seem that crazy. If you ask me, after everything that happened, they could have been much worse (which isn't an excuse) and were probably within reason after I'd allowed myself subconsciously to be so used.

Why did I claim I had been crazy once after a break up? Maybe because my behaviour was out of character for me? Maybe because after years of listening to my male friends and brothers talk about break ups, I thought all women were mental and unstable, and that was my one claim to it.
Or maybe it's because I'd been led to believe I had acted crazy, off the scale of sane, completely mental. Who had led me to believe this? Well other than the occasional unfair behaviour I've received from him and some of his friends, maybe the unfair reviews I'd heard about myself or maybe it was due to the pressures of the media, where on average the emotional train wrecks of woman are always completely to blame, maybe I made myself the villain?! Maybe some, maybe all? who knows. But I am sorry to myself for accusing myself of being crazy!

Yes, at the time I was acting outside of rational behaviour compared to my normal behavioural pattern, but I was reacting to how I'd felt I'd been treated. We are all welcome to our own opinions on other people's relationships (and I'm talking about all types of relationships), but we don't have the right to express these. Within all relationships, there are good guys and bad guys but on average, these qualities are shared between the two parties. It's wholely unfair to hold one side completely accountable and not the other. And why is it that in these modern times, when women have such an equal footing as men, we women are often accused of being the villains?

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Horn Rimmed Wonders

I got to select new glasses the other day. It was very exciting.
I've worn glasses since I was 3 (although back then I was long-sighted, with one astigmatism and a lazy eye). I spent my childhood in classy NHS specs. They were uncool but very practical.
Around the age of 11, my mum finally allowed me to choose some proper frames. From only having three options (Red, Yellow or Blue), I had the pick of the shop. I was over joyed, I did what I'd done on many trips before but this time I had a goal, new glasses. After I'd tried on all of the frames in the shop, ridiculous frames, grandma glasses and " Deidre" frames, I finally rested my eyes on some large purple and mint speckled wonders. Now, they represent the early 90's, back then, they were the height of fashion and I loved them more than life.

I had a few years of no glasses through most of secondary school & college. Hit 18 years of age and my eyes went again, although this time I was short sighted with two astigmatisms. I went for some simple wire frames.
4 years later, I choose some cool red frames. My family called me Janet Street Porter and I've worn them for four years.

I've had an idea for a few months that I might like horn rimmed glasses, I've no idea why, maybe I've watched too much Heroes.
I got my eyes tested and got to choose some new frames, while approaching the frames sales man, I announced "I want some old man glasses", he looked surprised but decided to accompany me on the journey, probably wanted a good laugh.
I tried on every pair of glasses in the shop, I felt like a kid again (he's lucky I didn't act entirely as I did when I was a child, otherwise I'd have been spinning myself around on the chairs constantly), all giddy with the excitement of the unexpected, I love glasses shopping. I tried them all on and kept on going back to this one pair of horn rimmed wonders!

I bit the bullet and bought them. They are great, I'm not sure if they entirely suit me but I don't care, I love them!

P.S. I've been going to the same opticians since day one and I love them. There are none of these machines reading your eyes, oh no there is a lovely person who puts the ever cool lenses holding specs on & they slot in different lenses time after time, constantly checking different things on the light board, It's awesome, so much fun, like a little time warp. If only the old guy was there, the one who smelt like talcum powder.

Friday, October 02, 2009

Little Happy Songs

I decided this morning that I was going to compile a happy songs mix CD. I've gone through my iPod and looked at the most listened to songs, although this doesn't really count, due to playing certain playlists in the pub. But I think I've got (just about) my list of happy songs, songs that when I listen to them, I just smile from ear to ear without even thinking about it.
There are 38 in total and they all get me a little excited and some of them are so very uncool but I love them, I can't help it.

I'm not known as having a good taste in music, I'm known for having an eclectic taste, depending on who I'm talking with, depends on what people's views are but I don't care. They make me happy and that's all that matters.
I suppose the funniest thing is, just listening to them and trying to find them on youtube, etc, has made me smile ear to ear. They are just automatic smile instigators for me.

The highlights look like the following (that I could find on youtube):

Gladys Knight and the Pips - If I Were Your Woman.


Pete Townshend - Let my love open the door.
I prefer Sondre Lerche's version but you've got to appreciate the original.


George Harrison - Got my mind set on you.


Golden Earring - Radar Love.


Dead Prez - Hip-Hop.


Mr Big - To be with you.


ELO - Livin' Thing.


Regina Spektor - Us.


Womack & Womack - Teardrops.


Sara Bareilles - Love Song.


Bruce Springsteen - Dancing in the Dark.


Cat Power - He War

And the final one I'll leave you with is the song that can turn my day around (I'm not so proud of it but you can't choose these songs, they choose you) and it reminds me of being a carefree teenager.

New Radicals - You get what you give.

P.S. What is weird is that Queen don't feature?! They should, they really should but most of their songs represent something to me, so I guess they can't feature.

Ooo, Red Shoes!

I've just read that if you're above a US size 6, then you are considered a plus size model?! What the?! That's fucking mental!!! If you are more than a size 10, you're plus size?! You mean, you're thin in the real world but large in the modeling world. I know that is realistic in modeling but it's just so crazy. No wonder kids now a days are so fucked up with body issues.

I've bought the most adorable pair of red shoes! They are flats from New Look but oh so bright red. I'm actually in love, spent some time last night thinking about outfits to complement them, all that went to shit once I finally dragged myself out of bed, late like usual, and found myself unable to compute anything! I'm probably going to buy them in navy too! I love New Look shoes, cheap, cheerful and happy!

I'm keeping my girl crush happy by watching '(500) Days of Summer', I love Zooey Dechanel so much! I'd go gay for two ladies, her and my friend Lou. Although so far I've not been able to convince Lou, I even promised her an old fashioned Volvo, yet alas still nothing! Maybe one day, although I guess it would help if I was gay too!
Anyway, I've been wanting to see this film for a while, I constantly keep tabs on the trailers coming out, I'm probably one of the only people who goes to the cinema early to catch the trailers, although I do hate actual adverts at the cinema, they suck!!!
I'm 50 minutes in and it's beautiful, it opens with Regina Spektor's Us (which is will featuring on my happy songs mix cd), which if you ask me, is a very promising sign.

The Queen gave me an old cardigan the other day, it's a size 18 cream twisted knit affair. I'm a 10-12. Night off, sewing machine comes out, second thoughts Overlocker comes out. I resize, pin and overlock the cardigan - what a mistake. The overlocker got stuck at the armpit, I nearly made myself some aeration holes, a inch in depth later and a lot of cardigan armipit lost, it's finished. The second sleeve went accordingly, thankfully. It's now a snug fit but looks pretty cool.

I'm not sure why, maybe the holiday I had or something has changed me inside but I feel a strange inner calm, I don't constantly feel responsible for everything in this world. I don't feel constantly tired or as though I can't keep up, I just feel calm. I'm up financials shit creek but I don't care so much, which is odd. I probably should but right now, I'm happy just to feel calm and happy. Maybe this is what happens when people don't work non-stop and have no time to sit and watch the world go by?

Thursday, October 01, 2009

Plenty of a Name Change

Out of interest, do you think that people use more Bounty kitchen roll, now it's called Plenty.

As it is a fantastic marketing scheme if so.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

My Left Foot

Whenever my boss can't remember the name of the band in the studio, he'll call them 'My Left Foot'. For ages, this confused me, I had no idea why when he could call them 'Thingmajig' or 'Thatracket', he'd call them that. So I asked him, and he simply said "When bands have a stupid name I can't remember, I'll use the title of a great film, it always makes them sound better".
I added 'My Left Foot' to my lovefilm list, I'd never heard of it but want to see every great, average and shite film in the world ever.

It finally came through and I watched it, and oh my god!!! It's incredible! When nearing the end, I stated "if Daniel Day Lewis didn't get an award for this, it's a fucked up world", he did and he deserved it. I suppose acknowledging that he's a method actor, makes it's even more incredible (although that isn't why he should win things) and I think you'd have to have lived with such a disabling disorder to truly be able to portray it in it's correct sense.

I laughed out loud and uncontrollably, and cried within 5 minutes of each other. It's really good.

P.S. If you do want to watch it and can't find it in any video shops, it's up on YouTube but I didn't say that.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Simon & The Witch

I'm watching Hollyoaks Later, well I've nothing better to do. And saw an actress, who reminded me of one of the greatest children's tv shows of my childhood.
Welcome to reminiscing alley!



Plus, due to a video a friend made of his world trip, I've fallen in love with a new band and a particular song, thanks Matt.
The Envy Corps - Rhinemaidens

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Kindness leaves me flustered

When people perform random acts of kindness towards me, it completely throws me. I get extremely flattered, flustered and embarrassed. On Wednesday, due to Lou's leaving shindig the night before, I felt like death (I guess partying until 5am isn't a good idea on a school night), it took me an hour to convince myself to get out of bed. Realistically, I shouldn't have come to work, I failed. Was an hour late and generally hopeless!
Lunchtime came, I failed at eating, I was a failure, a BIG FAT FAILURE!!! Then the post arrived!
In the post was a jiffy envelope, I dreaded opening it, I assumed it was a demo, I hate demos. I eventually opened it and had a lovely surprise. It was the new album of a band I like. It was sent to me by a guy who I met 3 weeks ago. He lives with some of my friends in London and works for the band's record company and we spent the night getting hammered.
This lone kind considerate act has made me so flattered and flustered. It's odd, I'm normally the one who tries to give, so to received is a strange new experience.


Last Thursday, I had dinner with 19 bulti-billionaires. All whom could have donated £1000 each to the "Pipsywoo Charity Fund" and not even notice it missing. I mean, one of them owns an island, a fucking island!!!
After dinner, we went back to the hotel bar for some drinks. I was talking to the younger of the group and he was asking me if Tiffany earrings would be an adequate Christmas present for a new girlfriend. I said yes (well duh!) but asked if it was not a little cliche. He said he didn't think so but wanted a female's perspective, he said he was also treating her to a weekend in Paris and some other little items.
I said it all sounded charming but personally I'd rather my favourite chocolate bar and a thoughtful personal message or something like that, which then made me sound like I was basically calling him unthoughtful. It just went from wronger to worse and I ended up apologising for being small time and countryfied.
But seriously, if he buys all this for their first Christmas together, what on earth is he going to get her next Christmas or for her birthday?

Had a thought the other day. I'm guessing Lady GaGa must spend her entire free time at the beauticians getting her bikini line waxed.

Late Monday night our kitchen sink blocked. Come Tuesday evening, we set about sorting it out. We plunged, we tried pipe unblockers, we poked things down it but to no avail.
After waiting 30 minutes for the industrial sink unblocker to budge the blockage and it still not working, I took to taking the pipes apart. One twist of the U bend and the water gushed horizontally everywhere. One bucket in hand catching very little water, unable to fetch another I had one option, hurry the hell up with undoing the pipe, all the while Dave and Sheri were running around looking for vessels and cloths.
Two buckets later, the sink is emptied and cleaner than I'd ever seen it. I smell like stagnant water and the cupboards and kitchen floor are sodden! On the upside the pipe is clear of said blockage. Sheri assists with the clearing up and my skin is burning due to all of the drain unblocker.
One sink unblocked, one indoor swimming pool created and one smelly being off to wash and change outfits.
I think my major mistake was not putting the plug in the sink, while undoing the pipe. It would have probably made our new swimming pool, more of a paddling pool.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

New Housie Required

I need a new housemate, sorry, we need a new housemate.
When searching for a new housie, a lot of things have to be researched, it's hard.
Firstly, you all have to get along with the person, it's better for it to be someone you know of or occasionally see but aren't good good friends with, as most good friendships can be broken by the simplicity of living together.
Secondly, they have to be respectable people but you can't tell this until they've lived with you for a short while, by which point it's too late and you can't kick them out.
Thirdly, all the shit that comes afterwards is just learning curves but we will find someone, I'm sure we will. At least this time round, it's about the time people are looking for new digs, instead of over Christmas.

Whatever, it's all about selling yourself and justifying how your choice in home.

I've posted a little advert in my status on Facebook. I've been rather straight forward and quirky:
New Housie required. £300 a month, plus bills for a charming single bedroom in one of the greatest houses in East Oxford. Fabulous Roomies and a rather fantastic location. Available from November 5th. All enquires contact: Me, Mr Food aka Dave Chicken, The Aussie aka Nina or Chips Mahomeo aka Tom Reynolds! See I told you we were fun!

What I'd love to write is more of an essay but totally impractical and probably far too honest:
One single room near to the Cowley Road, with storage on the landing. £300 a month with bills exclusive. Privately rented direct from Landlord, who is rather marvellous, he's great!
Morning sunlight to wake you from slumber, with the calming sound of the whale song.
Kitchen/sitting room in one, no more requirement to open doors between rooms, we've the uni-room. We're also expecting a new set of kitchen cabinets to be fitted soon - how swanky can we get?
Washing machine, fridges and even a cooker - how far out are we?! No microwave though, as we are protecting you against crazy cancer causing rays, which will rot your brain. Quaint raised garden with washing line for your every drying desires.
Internet available with digital TV for your personal entertainment, as long as you like bad American reality TV or shit shows about vampires. Wrestling and Hollyoaks fan appreciated.
If all else fails, you'll get a private DVD hire from me, as long as you respect them and return when necessary, what more could you want than a free DVD hire and occasional late fees!
Bathroom to be shared with two ladies and it's newly tiled for easy slip sliding.
Ironing board and iron available to flatten out all of the creases in your life. If you've no idea how to clean, I can always teach you. We enjoy recycling and by that I mean, I supply all of the necessary items to do so effortlessly and easily, with the weekly complaint from me about getting it wrong, this is for your entertainment also.
We are a smoking household but could keep it to our bedrooms if need be. Friends of Gary, are friends of ours.
If you're lucky, you'll inevitably end up on the Wall of Fame - Come and live with us!
P.S. I'm the uncoolest member of my house so it you find this funny, you probably don't fit in. Bad luck! Although, I totally think you're grand!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Uncle Buck

I finally got the new tyres for my car today, which now makes me 100% street legal. £85 later and I now have a lighter car to drive, it's more responsive and feels like it drives much easier, which is all pretty cool. Who'd have thought two new tyres would change so much.

I've been getting my knit on to a dramatic effect lately. I've been going to sleep with achy hands and waking craving the desire to knit, knit away. I've also spent far too much time in the local wool shop and if I can't knit it, sew it, melt and mould it or paint it, my friends and family won't be getting it for Christmas. When you make everything for your Christmas presents, it means you have to get extremely organised. I've so far made numerous scarves and one hat.

Talking of melting and moulding, I've been asked if I'd like to have a stall at the weekly farmers market off Cowley Road, I never even knew it existed. I'm now in the world of buying Charity Shop cups and saucers and making them in to candles, I'm so very excited at the prospect of it all. I'm thinking about making some brooches for it also.

I'm off work this week, both of them and so far it feels like I've not had a holiday at all. It just feels like a weekend. I aimed to not book myself up or offer my time to others, but I appear to have failed without meaning too. It's all cool though, I've a couple of evenings free and also a dinner with my boss and 20 other middle aged men who will have been playing golf all day. Last years golf dinner was a lot of fun, I'm hoping this years will be better; better food, better drink and more cheer. Just need to memorise a couple of horrendously dirty jokes and I'm quids in!

I had loads of funny anicdotes and stories but they all ran out of my head as soon as I started the computer, nevermind, they'll return one day.

The weekend before last, while talking with a friend I discovered she had never seen Uncle Buck, god knows how?! I guess she's been living under a rock, she is from Nottingham, so this is possible. I will be rectifying this asap, do not worry!


Also, the other night, Sheri and I had a random girly night in and ended up watching a chick flim, we chose "Confessions of a Shopaholic", now I've issues with it due to to loving the books but chose to watch it as though the books had never existed. It's watchable and has it's moments. Joan Cusack and John Goodmen plays Isla Fisher's parents and they are great in this role, very entertaining to watch. The funniest moment was as the credits rolled, which probably sums up the film pretty well for you.

Friday, September 04, 2009

Sequins on Bedding, Nice!

I happened to be in Debenham's home department the other day. I was looking at bedding and I came across Kylie's home range. Her bedding range comes with sequins, yep, I said sequins.
My original thought was "sequins on a duvet, how uncomfortable and itchy and impractical" and then I found out that there was a sequin trim on the pillow cases too?! What the ?!
Who would think that sequins on a pillow would be comfortable? Plus, have you ever tried to wash sequins? They generally loose their colouring and the stitching fails miserably after a couple of washes. You have to handwash and as most of us know, you have to boil wash your bedding after a week or two, due to it's soiled useage (this term makes me chuckle).
I've just no idea what she was thinking or should I say her design team was thinking...

I love seeing people walking while reading, it always makes me smile. It's up there with seeing men who are rubbish at laundry, there was a chap in the lunch queue in front of me earlier, who had shrunk his jumper in the wash, or at least it looked like it, so sweet.

Saturday night, my friends, 22-20s, performed live for the first time in 4 years. They've been in the studio recording new songs over the last months or so and it was truly great finally seeing them perform live. They were amazing. I was so nervous before hand on their behalf but they were absolutely brilliant, even though there was some technical faults.
We all ended up heading back to the studio to drink and be merry. 6.30am bed time, woo!
Although Dan did expose me to this, utter fabulousness!

All 14 episodes are up and apparently, it's great! I love that they opened with One Vision. Oh so good!!!

Dead Snow is awesome!!! I finally got to watch it on Sunday and haven't shut up about it since. Watch it!!!

Saw this online and was thinking that I may well have to get something similar sprayed on mine.

Glitz Up Your Crabs

I'm currently watching a TV show about Surrogate mothers and it is very odd. The surrogate mothers seem to know what it's all about, as they either have children or have been through it before but the new mothers are mental. I guess they are full of fear, worry, emotions, etc. I guess it must be an extremely hard situation to be in, impossibly hard. It's an extremely odd TV show. The people you assume you'd sympathise with, aren't the ones you care for.
I think the hardest thing is to work out, why the surrogates do it? Is it to fill a hole they feel from within or are they 100% level headed and emotionally stable and wanted to give people the gift they've longed for for the longest time.

I often read Postsecrets, recently I've found one of my all time favourite cards. It's what I'm personally looking for. I always state when people ask me why I'm single "That I haven't found anyone who doesn't make me want to smother them in their sleep", which isn't far off the mark. No matter what people tell me, he's out there somewhere, he's just lost and refusing to ask for directions, like a typical bloke.

While on my weekly trawl through Jezebel I always stop to read Toddlers & Tiaras, it's your typical garish tv show about crazy women forcing their poor children to dress up like Vegas showgirls to perform bizarre routines.
But it's better than all of the ones you've seen before, except maybe Painted Babies from the mid 90s, which was pretty good. I just love the Jezebel ladies comments and also the little .gif files.
The image on the left is a screen grab from one of the shows, it just makes me chuckle so so much! I'm off, I've got to glitz up my crabs!

I finally received my copy of 'Dead Snow' and I've had no chance to see it! I had a 20 minute window to watch it since buying it but it was at 2am and I had work the next morning, plus zombie nazi's at 2am just before sleep, I don't think so! Oh tomorrow, why won't you come sooner.

Apparently 4000 people are on death row in America? They need to get Pierrepoint over there, he'd sort it out and save them loads of money...although he's dead, so maybe Timothy Spall should go on his behalf. He seemed to sort out the Belsen 11 rather quickly.

I'm not going to leave you with Nazis and death row, that would be horrendously cruel, instead I'm leaving you with Elton John "hell yeah!".

Thursday, August 27, 2009

iPod Reminder

My iPod just reminded me of something:

Thursday, August 06, 2009

More to Love

Not only is the whole concept for this tv show offensive, I understand that the production companies were just reacting to the onslaught of pissed off consumers by trying to include larger sized ladies and gents in this world of showbiz but the general idea for it, is so so wrong. For a start, why segregate the larger sized population? Since when has being larger, made you less attractive? Since when did larger ladies automatically like larger guys or vice versa? Do I need to go on with more points, I'm sure I'm missing the main points but bloody hell, what a horrendous tv show. I mean, why not have a tv show called "bulmic love", where people who cough up their food can find love among each other?

But what is more irritating is that the production company have chosen gorgeous curvy women, not one mildly unattractive woman in the bunch. All of them, generally have stunning slimmer faces and they all have in proportion bodies. They are all beautiful, stunning ladies, who should be proud of their figures and who they are and not be on a show with some chubby chaser, who probably doesn't give a shit about who they are, due to it being a tv show!

I feel like I should rant about how this tv show might reflect to the young malleable minds who watch it but I won't, as I'll be getting off the subject. I am just generally a little bit horrified!

It's not liberating, it's objectifying in such a wrong way but it's ok, as Fox TV has a tv show with some fat people who aren't being made to be automatically funny, or playing the best friend?! So due to them not being in their typical type cast role, it's fresh and interesting, of course!


On another note, I'm totally looking forward to this!

American Apparel

I often see a lot of press about American Apparel's new advert campaigns, and they seem to get worse and worse.

Originally the companies thesis for advertising and catalogue photos were supposed to be real life workers for the company, without make-up in a basic fashion and this I thought was a great thing. Real life people looking like, real life people. Alas when the company got popular (about two or three years ago), the ad campaigns got more professional and more sex based. I get that sex, controversy and shock sells, of course they do but how pathetic do they think the public really is? Personally, I feel a little perverted looking at them.

Following are some clips of recent and old ad campaigns by American Apparel:


















I think my biggest issue with the campaigns is that I love American Apparel. I have ever since I first found them. I always recommended them to my friends for cost effective, well made, ethnically reliable basics. I used to describe them to my friends as the Marks and Spencers for a younger generation, then they went all retro, which was fine, as the basics were still great but now with perverse advertising campaigns, it all seems a little shocking on purpose, which makes me not want to like them, which almost seems churlish. But what can you do when a company which once had a brilliant ethics then goes for the cheap shot?

Friday, July 31, 2009

Ooo, New Blog, Suits You Miss..

I've spent many days, weeks and years searching for photo blogs, like I've said before "I love photos", so have decided to create my own "oh, why not?".

Please click here to Snappy Flasher to see them. They'll be added intermittently and also, some of them are old but I love them nevertheless.


Enjoy!

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Next Blog

A while ago, Axl mentioned that he was hitting the 'next blog' button. I was stunned, I'd been blogging for how ever many months and had never noticed it. So I started my hitting of it.
It's great fun but often comes to a dead end, due to the button being removed or people having commercial blogs where they want you end up.

I love photos, I adore photos. I love paintings but I love photos. If any of you have been to my house, you'll have seen my 'hall of fame' which is a wall of photos in our hallway. I love taking photos and I love looking at them. Regardless of what the photos are of, I adore them. I often enjoy going to Magnum Photographic Essays and browsing through the millions of photos and listening to the photographers to hear about what they were aiming to catch and what they got.

Any how, it was rather quiet at work recently, so I started to hit the button. My original intention was to find some amateur photo blogs to enjoy, something new and refreshing, instead of the over photoshopped wonders you often find online. Something to truly capture my imagination. Art (I'm using the word art in a loose term, where I mean it to be paintings, photography, collage, etc.) is one of the only things that can move through this world, with no requirement of cultural understanding or language.

I clicked alot and I found a few photo blogs that really caught my attention, but there is one at the end of this, run of photos that I really liked. I also found some random blogs and some rather adoreable blogs. Photos and links below. Some were photos I liked, some were blogs I liked the look of. I've credited the blogs with the links and titles below...I hope you enjoy them!



Unregard Surtours / A False Front






Amfmmaodeobradearte / Srvenute





JeanetteShverdag / Guardian Doodler





Love Overflow / Lucy Mcrae









No More Lights / Ommmkietutoooo







Petites Stars / Photos from Sweden






Sunken Treasure Stuff / Vertiginouspervicaciousness





Vossy Line / The Illustrated Edition




A photo a day
It's been done before, they aren't incredible photos, it's simply a lovely little view of someone else' world. Some photos are quite remarkable and others are comical. Some have nice perspective/composition and others have interesting lighting. I just love the amateur, almost naive sense of it. I think it's generally rather charming...

Below are some of the photos I liked: