Suicide by Rock n Roll

David Bowie - Rock n Roll Suicide

Every time I hear this song, I see it used in a film, where the main loveable character sings it at karaoke and looses their head by the end of the film. Here's hoping that one day, Hollywood reads my blog!

Get a Handle Pipsywoo

I'm currently hoping someone will employ me to be their assistant in London. Tom and I are heading that way in June. I'm overly excited, a little anxious and generally pissed off, but I'm only pissed off right now, in 30 minutes I'll be fine.

The reason I'm peed off is: I've signed up with a creative industry agency in London, whom everyone recommended. They seem extremely professional and nice. The lady who called me was so, so lovely and she organised me an interview at their offices on Monday, when Tom and I are hoping to get irritated and pissed off at the lack of flats in our chosen area.

To save time, they've sent me through an online prove it test, to ensure that I can use a computer (mainly, I think it's to prove I've at least a whole brain and can switch a computer on), I tried to take the test the evening I got it, but I decided I'd drink beer and watch bad TV instead, as I got nervous. Then I thought about it last night but I watched a sad film and cried instead. Today, I finally bit the bullet and I found that my Mac isn't eligible for the programme required, luckily my work Mac has a PC on it too, I'm still unsure why?!

I got it running and had a go. I thought I'd try Excel first, as I can use it to a relatively competent level, although my main usage for it is to make guest lists, calendars and touring budgets, nothing more exciting, like pie charts but maybe one day. I fucked up the test big and royally! Firstly, the user system she sent over was PC based Office 2007 (I knew it would be but I didn't realise how different it is to Mac's Office setup). We use Mac based Office 2011, and were on 2010 until a month a go (this transition alone took me two weeks to master). I spent most of the test trying to find where everything was and then I fucked it anyway, as I didn't realise that the first few questions were actually supposed to change things, instead of you click on the correct area, get no response and then move on. I'm a dick, I've never done one of these tests before, I only wrote my first CV, ever, last month.

I'm guessing I've got about 50% right, when in fact it should be at least 90%.

Secondly, after nerves and annoyance, I settled for a typing test but I freaked and started looking at what I was writing, instead of what I was supposed to be writing, then my hands started to shake so I kept on hitting the wrong keys and then, bang, just like that, the test was over. I got about two paragraphs just finished, if that, and they were tiny paragraphs.

I've got left Word (I feel mildly confident but am crapping my pants, due to feeling relatively confident about Excel. I'll end up searching for the right list, option, key, etc for most of it, again) and Powerpoint (which I've already explained I've never used, so that could be fun?!).

The thing is, I don't want to blame it on the different user faces, as that is bollocks and I've got to remember that most office in London use PC's. I've got to reacclimatise to the grey, non-sensicle, awkward world that is Microsoft. Whether I like it or not. Which won't be that hard, it's only been 10 years since I was using one actively. But I'm a quick learner and once I'm dealing with a PC everyday, I'll pick it up in no time, no time at all but throwing myself into a test which is wholly PC based and having never seen Excel or Word in PC Office 2007 format before, has made me feel crappy about the whole thing.

I just pray to god that my interviewer likes me, otherwise I'm screwed!

Man V. Food

I exposed my housemate to this TV show at the weekend, and she loved it. It's perfect weekend TV and it never fails to make me hungry!

I think he's great, what could be better than watching a guy devour shit loads of food?! Yum!

Some people wonder why you'd want to watch a guy eat copious amounts of food, my question is "why wouldn't you?", it's a feat of human accomplishment, I stupid accomplishment but one, none the less! I could never do it and why isn't he the size of the house?!

I wonder how often he films the epic eating? I'm assuming one a week, maybe?! One a day in a row would be crazy talk!

Just watch him eat 5 Fat sandwiches, god I'm starving now!

Gertrude Jeannette

What an awesome woman Gertrude is!

And I'm loving the tagline on the right "Woman: I had no clue my lover's dead granny was in the bedroom closet", it's so Jerry Springer! I can almost imagine Jerry saying "And here is the ex-lover's dead granny to have her say..".

Claudia Winkleman

I really dislike *Claudia Winkleman, I'm not sure when I started to dislike her, or when it became an over whelming desire to eradicate her from my television but I do.

I don't remember hating her back when (in fact I used to like her), but right now, I really dislike her and whenever she comes on the radio or tv, I want to remove her orange face and over khol'd eyes from said item. It's not personal, it's more that she seems a bit pointless. She currently hosts 'Film 2011' and yet they employ an film expert to tell her what the film is about and why it's good. I've never seen such a pointless situation in my life?! God, it makes me so so angry!!! I guess it's Film 2011 fault and not her's but I've some how morphed my issue on to her.

I bet 'Film 2011' ratings have declined massively since Jonathon Ross left, why not just have the film expert host it, or James King from Radio1 host it. Or launch a new face, who is charismatic and obsessively informed about films.

I saw her host "Nevermind the Buzzcocks" a while ago and she was pretty rubbish on that also. Unable to banter with the teams and bad timing with jokes but in an unfunny way. I'm sure she's a lovely person but couldn't she open a flower shop or a cake shop instead of hosting everything I want to watch!



*I dislike her so much that I considered linking to her Wikipedia page, to help identify her for you but couldn't be bothered, because I dislike her that much!!!

Blonde Moment

I always thought that an "airstrike" was when other countries forced your country to not fly planes or helicopters. No shit!

And I've always wondered why that would cause such disruption to civil war, etc. I knew it was wrong but never really thought about finding out what one actually was. I now know, it's all cool and it makes loads more sense, obviously!

Laurence Olivier

I'm not sure why but this is one of my favourite photos. It's by Terry O'Neill and I think it's perfect in every way!

Community Blogging

I'm trying to start a community blog with some female friends, who I think highly of.
I'd like it to be a collection of thoughts, feelings, desires, reviews, etc. that is what I'm aiming for. I've asked numerous friends to join me and I'm hoping eventually it'll pay off. It could be very interesting, if it works out.
Here's hoping for the future of This Bar / That Bar.

The Wire

I'm 28 minutes away from the end of the final episode. I'm going to lay my cards down and declare Bubbles "Reginald" the winner of the show. He's the only decent one out of the lot of them. Bloody hell, I'm going to miss it, it was a slow burning love but it is bloody great!
If you haven't seen it, do so!


- Posted from the pit of despair

Thank fuck for the NHS

I read this article today and it makes me thank god that we in Britain have the NHS. You may snipe, bitch and criticise it for how slow everything is and how crap it is run, but without it, we would all be having to pay huge bills for simple things like: doctor appointments, dentist check ups, operations, birth control, STD tests, etc.

We are one of the lucky countries, where most of this is, or can be free. And we should free privileged to have such an infrastructure. One that also will help tourists and aliens within our borders, without prejudice.
No, it's not perfect and a lot of the time it's dealing with twindling finances and constance 'round the houses' to get new policies in place. But it is something that we all take for granted and don't appreciate enough.

Maybe if we lived in a society where to get an abortion (a simple, private procedure), you have to face ignorant people, who feel it's their right to tell you, you'll burn in hell for killing a baby, regardless of considering there might be other issues at stake. Or if we had to pay for all of our birth control, or every visit we made to the doctors just to get a sick note, maybe we would then start to appreciate it?

PS I recommend the article above, it's well written and interesting to have an "abortion provider" talk openly about there profession. Especially from within a country where abortion can be seen as a huge taboo.

Kristen Schaal

I love love love Kristen Schaal, she's 100% amazing! If I was gay "hell yes"! Ever since I first saw her as Mel in "Flight of the Conchords", I've adored her. She's funny, intelligent and oh so adorably cute!

Here is a rather entertaining moment of her on "The Daily Show with John Stewart"!

Corinne Vionnet

Thoroughly enjoying her current project

An open letter to Hollywood...

Dear Hollywood,

Unless you have a magnificent computer generated film with a shit storyline, or an action packed film. There is no need to use 3D! I know it's all the rage at the moment and you can charge an extra £4 per ticket at the cinema, and make your film less interesting story wise, but it doesn't mean you can abuse this effect. Certain films are better with it and without it, pretty rubbish. Others have their own merits and should just stick to good old classic, silver screen style film making!

Kind regards
Pipsywoo

Drunken Countries

Here's a map of the drunkest countries. I like to think that I'm helping Britain stay dark purple!

Tom Waits

I do apologise if I've written about him before, I've spoken for years about my theory but am pretty sure I haven't actually written about it:

I've had a theory about Tom Waits for a while, not only is he awesome but any film he cameos in, will inevitably be awesome too.
He is the golden seal of, not only creditability, but also a certain fantastic level of "Indie", which no one else can do. I've started to watch films due to his cameo only and every time I'm more than pleased.

There is only one film on his imdb list that I'm unsure about "Domino", but I think my apprehension is the idea of Keira Knightley playing a bounty hunter?! Which I'm pretty sure most people would agree is a little hard to comprehend.

A mini list of Mr Waits' cameos:
Mystery Men,
Wristcutters: A Love Story,
The Fisher King,
The Outsiders,
Dracula,
Coffee & Cigarettes...and the list can go on and on and on...

I've got lots of him on my iPod and I've been meaning to get to grips with him more than I have, I've listened too and enjoyed "The Bone Machine", but that's it really.
Here's to my listening to his back catalogue and his future cameos. I salute you Mr Waits!

If anyone has any suggestions, please feel free to tell me...

- Posted from the pit of despair

Sorry, a five letter word!

"Sorry" it's a simple word. A simple five letter word. That to some means very little, but to most means a lot.
I learnt quite early on to not be flippant with this word, otherwise when you really mean it, no one will believe you. It was a relatively valuable lesson. Due to that lesson, it's now a relatively important word to me also.

I think it's such a shame that there are people in this word who still haven't learnt the value of this word. Saying "sorry" doesn't make you weak, or make you responsible for a situation you're not comfortable with. It generally makes you stronger, and means you value the person you say it to, or at least you value their feelings. I know one person in particular who has spent most of their life throwing this word around and has never really meant it and now, the one time it would have been nice to hear it, it's no where in sight. I guess they haven't learnt the lesson yet, which is a shame.

Also, isn't it weird how there is a time limit that comes with "sorry". It's so bizarre that if you haven't heard it within a certain time of when you'd hope you might, you start to give up on that friend entirely. Who would have thought a five letter word could represent so much?

Birthday present dreaming already...

I've my fingers crossed for these for my birthday, as well as an exciting 500gb back up drive for my computer (life sometimes is far too exciting) and Lost Season 6.

The people of Washington State must be lonely...

Bangable dudes in History!

This is a great site!!!

Frozen

I also watched this, my friend and I were looking for an extremely shit horror film to watch, the kind where you side with the killers. Now we knew there were no killers, but we wondered how you could stretch out sitting up on a ski lift for an hour and a half. We were pleasantly surprised, randomly?!
The film wasn't as bad as it could have been and I think it was a wise idea of the director to actually stick the cast up on the chair, instead of using poor/cheap special affects.
If you want to be mildly entertained and horrified by a genius use of sound affects, watch it. But please, do not get your hopes up. In fact, do as we did and believe it's going to be horrendous, that way you'll end up pleasantly surprised.



When I imdb the director, I found he'd made a film called 'Cheerleader Camp', now doesn't that sound like an awesome film!