Image courtesy of the internet
One of the hardest parts of wedding planning is that everyone else isn't as excited as you are.
I tried to arrange all of my bridesmaid to come to London to go wedding dress shopping, I had three responses saying 'yes, let me know when', one telling me that they were super busy and if it as a practical time, they'd attend' and one saying that 'they were coming to London with their baby soon and she'd let me know how it went'. I decided to put the last two comments down to lack of sleep.
In regards to the wedding, Ro has had various responses, not all super positive and supportive. However, it is slowly coming together and if I have to drive to people's homes to get proper commitment from them, I will. I think if it was a simple day wedding, we would experience less stress, however we chose a weekend event...why did I always dream of spending the weekend with our friends and family?
The good news, is that we have had some great responses and amazing offers of support: free dining linen, bouquet, suit, photography, music (DJ and live) and general ears and advice. It has definitely been a clarifying experience, where we have had the chance to review certain relationships.
My advice to anyone else would be 'do not pin your heart on certain people reacting as you would like them to and if they don't, it isn't necessarily a bad thing, they may be distracted, have personal shit going on, or maybe just don't feel it's as important as what else they have going on'.
There is no point driving yourself mad about it, just find someone who is excited and do your favourite things with them, you'll probably have more fun and a better experience than dragging those who can not assist around with you, and this is exactly what I've done. It was too stressful trying to arrange all five bridesmaids, four of whom don't live in London, so I arranged my one London bridesmaid and a good friend to come with me to go dress shopping. Additionally, I hoped to go ugly wedding dress shopping with one of my bridesmaids but she's snowed under with her children and home improvements, and I don't want to add to her ever growing list of things to do, so I am going with my cousin and a good friend...and I can't wait.
It is upsetting that you have to change the people you want to spend time with, but I came to the conclusion that I would hate to add extra pressure to their lives and therefore would rather carry on, instead of not getting to do what I wanted...which I know sounds selfish, but I have a limited amount of time to do certain things, especially as my wedding date isn't going anywhere. I've always tried to be there for my friends when they've needed me, but if they can not be there for me right now, I'll enjoy them when they can and enjoy everyone else in the mean time.