So far this week, it's all been rather uneventful, compared to recent weeks but it's been a lot of fun. The way I view life is it's not what happens, it's how you tell the stories of what happened that make life interesting or not.
Hence my requirement to always put a comical angle and a rosy glow to any events, bad or good - at least that way it'll be entertaining for others and most of the time sound like a fairytale - which after all are some of my favourite styles of stories.
So let's start with Saturday night, I know it's unorthodox but playing by the rules is boring.
I originally had Saturday night booked off, due to drinking plans but everyone got busy else where, so I said I'd help at the pub for the rugby...the pub was rammed when I arrived, 3 deep, haven't seen it like that in ages, so set about serving people booze, the first person I served was a rather handsome chap in a rugby shirt, who had hulking shoulders and a cheeky smile - mmm! After the game finished, I put on the only fitting song I could think off 'Another one bites the dust' by one of the greatest bands in the world - Queen! It went down ok, I think everyone was too busy licking their wounds to even notice the ironic undertones of the song.
I continued to help out for a while and then eventually clocked off, with a few pints inside me, drank some more with my housemates and friends, at one point I drank too much (am in the belief the Tuaca makes me go insane, I was scaring people who were drugged up - that's impressive for one who just drinks), anyway, like I was saying drinking away to the point where even when we got home at midnight, I was still drinking - not at any point did I consider being too drunk - god damn, why did I not consider that?!
That night I force fed Roo's girlfriend Red Bull, danced my head off, flushed my half dead goldfish Bob (long live Bob), chatted to Beth and then realised that chuckupvilles was a nice place to visit twice. Finally passed out in bed.
To wake up on Sunday with a hangover from hell, I was literally sick every 5 minutes over the space of 3 hours to the point where I got the fear of dying, at which point I called for help from the housemates, who were fabulous. Cheers Chips and Ninor.
Finally felt alive and stopped feeling sick at about 6pm after a few hours sleep. The house went out for dinner, I had a meaty steak to replenished my lost stock and it was so so good - no wine though for obvious reasons.
Monday consisted of my getting up and going to the capital, everything ran to plan and as I turned up so did the coach, we all got on, I just sat down when the bus pulled away and then slammed his brakes on, to which I heard the sound of a girl falling down the stairs backwards - ouch!!! After a 20 minute delay, the ambulance taking the poor thing off and us being shipped on to a new bus, we were off again.
An hour later I arrived in one of my favourite cities but in one of my least favourite parts of it (god damn Oxford Street - the best thing about Oxford Street is the Selfridges Christmas Windows)..met up with one of works accountants who is a lot of fun, had some sushi (yummy, thanks Azmat), left Azmat and went to an exhibition at The Barbican.
This exhibition is good, very good...although if you're a little prudish, do not attend as it's all about sex and how's it's been perceived through the years through different cultures - the Asian population are right dirty fuckers! It was quite inspiring and also very interesting, although if like me you're single and have no "special" friends, don't go - one of the bigger anti-climaxes of my life, lol. But all in all, brilliantly curated!
Tuesday I woke for a early morning bike ride around Oxford, as always when I cycle by the river, only female rowers, no bulky men - god damn. While in town I purchased some oils so I've no excuse to put off my new painting, like I've been putting off making my new curtains - procrastinating is loads of fun. Did some cleaning, came to work and then went home to join Lezzard and Dave for some crap horror films, no need to leave the light on that night, they weren't even a little scary, although I did scream twice during the first one but I'm a jumpy bunny, what can I say.
Wednesday, work and work, although I did receive one of the best chat up lines ever (I'm a sucker for chat up lines, love the cheesy ones delivered in a hellish cheesy manner and I love the ones that make we women buckle at first hearing). This one was a new one on me but a lovely one nevertheless.
"Your mother must be a beautiful lady" I thought it was nice, although he was quite old, so either he was complimenting me, or trying to chat me up or wanting my mum's number, god knows?! But anyhow, thought it was rather adorable.
All in all, not a bad week so far - fingers crossed for the rest of it, although I originally had a night off on Friday to get wasted but it's had to be cancelled due to other commitments, was hoping to go drinking with The Fizz but she's now got to work, so think I may as well earn money also, at least that way I can afford Kiwiland in February.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Monday, October 15, 2007
Pipsywoo Is...
Pipsywoo Is...getting fed up with her head and how easily her Facebook status has over taken her life.
It was originally a bit of fun, some make me laugh, others are factual BUT...lately, it's become a bit of an 80's rom com gone bad, really bad!
Everything I do, I "Status" it in my head:
Pipsywoo Is:
...making a cup of coffee.
...going to the toilet.
...going out to get fucked.
...listening to motown.
...drooling over a photo of someone.
...at work.
...thinking of something to write here (never had this one before, always have plenty to say, that's the problem!).
But lately, I've been doing the voice over in my head, think a classic episode of 'The Wonder Years', everything I do is accompanied by "Pipsywoo is...", this is not a good state to be in...not at all.
It's got to the point, where I'm finding ways to get around the constant setting of "Is", Pipsywoo is glad that she went out, etc, not good at all.
Am banning myself from a status!
Maybe If I had a proper job where I'm busy from start to finish, like those rare days here, I wouldn't have as much time to think of these stupid things but the case is that I'm told to distract myself if I get bored and that as long as I do my job, no one cares what I actually do - oh, ok!
I am seriously going to re-evaluate my facebook dedication and maybe start finding other things to do but the internet is a rather boring place!
It was originally a bit of fun, some make me laugh, others are factual BUT...lately, it's become a bit of an 80's rom com gone bad, really bad!
Everything I do, I "Status" it in my head:
Pipsywoo Is:
...making a cup of coffee.
...going to the toilet.
...going out to get fucked.
...listening to motown.
...drooling over a photo of someone.
...at work.
...thinking of something to write here (never had this one before, always have plenty to say, that's the problem!).
But lately, I've been doing the voice over in my head, think a classic episode of 'The Wonder Years', everything I do is accompanied by "Pipsywoo is...", this is not a good state to be in...not at all.
It's got to the point, where I'm finding ways to get around the constant setting of "Is", Pipsywoo is glad that she went out, etc, not good at all.
Am banning myself from a status!
Maybe If I had a proper job where I'm busy from start to finish, like those rare days here, I wouldn't have as much time to think of these stupid things but the case is that I'm told to distract myself if I get bored and that as long as I do my job, no one cares what I actually do - oh, ok!
I am seriously going to re-evaluate my facebook dedication and maybe start finding other things to do but the internet is a rather boring place!
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Freaking Old Age
When I was younger, I could sleep for hours non stop, undisturbed sleep easily for at least 10-13 hours a go. I also used to have Sunday bath night (yeah, I'm that cool) I used to light candles, add oils and bubbles and settle in for an hour or two for total relaxation. I used to stay up for 2 days in a row and eat whatever I liked.
Nowadays, I find it hard to sleep for more than 8 hours max, I try but it never works, unless I'm ill. I run baths, settle in for a good hours reading and after 20 minutes I get bored and have to get out of the bath. As for staying up, I like regualrity in my life now and as for eating, I have to eat certain sized portions or I gain more weight then I'd like and I have to make sure I don't eat as many sweet foods.
It sucks being older in many ways but it is also so cool....I'm so more aware of who I am and what I like, am having more fun and don't bother hanging around people who bore me now a days, etc.
Nowadays, I find it hard to sleep for more than 8 hours max, I try but it never works, unless I'm ill. I run baths, settle in for a good hours reading and after 20 minutes I get bored and have to get out of the bath. As for staying up, I like regualrity in my life now and as for eating, I have to eat certain sized portions or I gain more weight then I'd like and I have to make sure I don't eat as many sweet foods.
It sucks being older in many ways but it is also so cool....I'm so more aware of who I am and what I like, am having more fun and don't bother hanging around people who bore me now a days, etc.
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Pucker Up!
I've been thinking for a while about how certain acts that we humans do, are extremely strange.
Why do we shake hands? Why do we kiss? Why do we clap to show appreciation? And sex, what on earth is that about?!
The main one that confuses me is kissing, it doesn't appear to really do anything health wise and when the kiss is right, it sends shivers right through you're whole system and makes you light headed, but is that because we relate it to a sexual act, or because of nerve endings and where they are connected too.
I've had my share of kisses over the years:
My first kiss was when I was about 7 years old, it was sloppy and vile, I thought that he'd licked my entire face - horrid! (But thank you Jo, it means a lot that you shared your boyfriend with me for my first kiss).
I've had the tight mouth kisser, when they hardly move their mouth or lips.
The guy who always follow every kiss with a peck on the lips.
The kisser who never used his tongue, ever!!! Literally kissed me as though we were 80.
I've had the kisser who used only tongue, no lips, no warm up.
The guy who had no rhythm.
I've kissed the guy who used the inside of his lips, so it was quite sloppy.
The guy who always tilted his head to the left - pretty awkward!
And the guy who was perfect in everyway, other than his halitosis.
I've discussed this matter with a few of my ladies friends and I think we are set on the perfect kiss being the following:
Lips, full pouty lips with no tongue to begin with, good pattern and rhythm of movement, not too open or closed.
When stepping up a gear, maybe a little more open and a bit of tongue, working well with the rhythm.
When the passion heats up, obviously more tongue and probably a little more open but only when the passion level is right.
I personally love it when the man stiffens his top lip, adore it in fact, but I also love stubble tingle on my top lip, so maybe I'm a little weird.
But kissing, it's awfully good fun but a random act that's never truly been explained!
Some random Kissing facts:
* Kissing prevents cavities and plaque build-up by stimulating saliva production while preventing gingivitis through the calcium present in saliva.
* Kissing stimulates over 30 facial muscles which smoothes out skin and increase blood circulation to the face.
* Kissing burns 12 calories per five-second episode and three passionate kisses a day will help you lose one pound!
*Kissing releases the same neurotransmitters (chemical messengers in the brain) as those that are released when you engage in intense exercise such as running a marathon or skydiving. This causes your heart to beat faster and your breathing to become deep and irregular.
* Kissing stabilizes cardiovascular activity, decreases high blood pressure, and lowers cholesterol.
* Kissing prevents the formation of the stress hormone glucocorticoids which causes high blood pressure, muscle weakening and insomnia.
* Kissing does its part to vaccinate people from new germs. Saliva contains bacteria, 80% of them are common to all people with 20% unique to each person. By sharing saliva with a partner, you are stimulating your immune system to respond to the different bacteria you are being exposed to. The result is that your immune system creates certain anti-bodies to these new bacteria, which in effect vaccinates you against these germs. This process is called cross-immunotherapy.
* Finally, you may not be surprised to know that kissing offers an express analysis of genetic compatibility. While you are kissing, your brain conducts instant chemical analysis of your partner's saliva and issues a "verdict" of your genetic compatibility. Think about it. Don't you know much more about what you like or don't like in a person after one kiss? And kissing is much more fun than taking a relationship inventory!
Info from: http://www.celebratelove.com/thekiss.htm
Why do we shake hands? Why do we kiss? Why do we clap to show appreciation? And sex, what on earth is that about?!
The main one that confuses me is kissing, it doesn't appear to really do anything health wise and when the kiss is right, it sends shivers right through you're whole system and makes you light headed, but is that because we relate it to a sexual act, or because of nerve endings and where they are connected too.
I've had my share of kisses over the years:
My first kiss was when I was about 7 years old, it was sloppy and vile, I thought that he'd licked my entire face - horrid! (But thank you Jo, it means a lot that you shared your boyfriend with me for my first kiss).
I've had the tight mouth kisser, when they hardly move their mouth or lips.
The guy who always follow every kiss with a peck on the lips.
The kisser who never used his tongue, ever!!! Literally kissed me as though we were 80.
I've had the kisser who used only tongue, no lips, no warm up.
The guy who had no rhythm.
I've kissed the guy who used the inside of his lips, so it was quite sloppy.
The guy who always tilted his head to the left - pretty awkward!
And the guy who was perfect in everyway, other than his halitosis.
I've discussed this matter with a few of my ladies friends and I think we are set on the perfect kiss being the following:
Lips, full pouty lips with no tongue to begin with, good pattern and rhythm of movement, not too open or closed.
When stepping up a gear, maybe a little more open and a bit of tongue, working well with the rhythm.
When the passion heats up, obviously more tongue and probably a little more open but only when the passion level is right.
I personally love it when the man stiffens his top lip, adore it in fact, but I also love stubble tingle on my top lip, so maybe I'm a little weird.
But kissing, it's awfully good fun but a random act that's never truly been explained!
Some random Kissing facts:
* Kissing prevents cavities and plaque build-up by stimulating saliva production while preventing gingivitis through the calcium present in saliva.
* Kissing stimulates over 30 facial muscles which smoothes out skin and increase blood circulation to the face.
* Kissing burns 12 calories per five-second episode and three passionate kisses a day will help you lose one pound!
*Kissing releases the same neurotransmitters (chemical messengers in the brain) as those that are released when you engage in intense exercise such as running a marathon or skydiving. This causes your heart to beat faster and your breathing to become deep and irregular.
* Kissing stabilizes cardiovascular activity, decreases high blood pressure, and lowers cholesterol.
* Kissing prevents the formation of the stress hormone glucocorticoids which causes high blood pressure, muscle weakening and insomnia.
* Kissing does its part to vaccinate people from new germs. Saliva contains bacteria, 80% of them are common to all people with 20% unique to each person. By sharing saliva with a partner, you are stimulating your immune system to respond to the different bacteria you are being exposed to. The result is that your immune system creates certain anti-bodies to these new bacteria, which in effect vaccinates you against these germs. This process is called cross-immunotherapy.
* Finally, you may not be surprised to know that kissing offers an express analysis of genetic compatibility. While you are kissing, your brain conducts instant chemical analysis of your partner's saliva and issues a "verdict" of your genetic compatibility. Think about it. Don't you know much more about what you like or don't like in a person after one kiss? And kissing is much more fun than taking a relationship inventory!
Info from: http://www.celebratelove.com/thekiss.htm
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Personal ads
I'm currently reading a book (yeah I know, a book - reading - me, never thought it was possible, did you?), anyhow, within this book the lady is going through a divorce and she's put a personal ad in a paper. Her personal ad is so precise and rather scary - if I was a bloke, I wouldn't apply...no way.
So, I set about thinking about the things she put in her ad, aren't they things you're suppose to learn and discover during the dating period, the fun things to learn and try to memorise. I'm not sure if any of you (myspace friends of mine) remember but a while a go I wrote a personal ad on my myspace blog (due to friends insisting it's not right for a girl to be single and happy, so I cracked under the pressure and it also made me laugh, A LOT)...I'm sure it'll have changed a little since I wrote it but if I was going to write a hugely precise personal ad, what would I put in it and what would I forget by mistake...I think mine would read something like this:
I like my sleep but normally between 3-11am, I'm a complete night owl. I love to hate daytime tv. I adore bad American comedies that I can ridicule. I love finding spelling mistakes in magazines, papers and especially menus. I'm generally a light hearted girl and relatively easy going. I love banter, am quick witted and have a dark sense of humour. I've the table manners to eat with anyone from the Queen to a pack of wild dogs, other wise known as children. I love the little things, smells, flowers, nature, tokens of friendships, entering a warm cosy house from the cold, sparklers, photography, friends laughter. My friends and family generally come first. I love time with myself, as much as I love time with friends. I like doing crosswords alone, I hate people helping me, unless I've asked them too. I love going outside, walking in the countryside, bike rides, etc but I also adore a day on the sofa watching films and scoffing my face. I'm pretty independent, so you'll need to be so too. I can be one of the guys but don't treat me like this all the time, I am a girl after all. I love to shop for anything and nothing but I hate shopping during the sales. I love my friends and will understand and defend their actions to the skies. I find it very hard to say no, please don't test me, I feel guilty for a lot of what I don't do. I can be a bit of a neat freak. I love high heels but I generally keep them for special occasions or emotional pick me ups. I'm a cynical optimist and yes that is possible. I love dressing up, whether it's fancy dress or for dates. I love eating out and going out. I know what I like and what I don't, if I'm unsure or unresearched I'll let you know. I love going to art galleries, museums and locations with good history value. I'm generally accepting of people's opinions, I may not agree with them but I respect the right to have an opinion. I'm mac based, not pc, therefore I need it simple and straight up! I'm a fighter not a debater.
You see, I could go on but I won't...the only problem with this is that, I've spoilt the first half of getting to know someone, some of these will either be said in conversation, learnt in time or mentioned along the line...it's the whole point of getting to know someone and there is nothing better than the first fight in a new relationship, where you learn more about your than you did before.
I'd rather someone learnt this, I'd rather they didn't know some of it, I'd rather it was found out in the old fashioned sense of the world. Maybe that's why I always go for the old fashioned way and it's probably also why I don't like the idea of speed dating, dating websites, etc - I'd rather just one day bump in to someone, I like the mystery of never knowing when I may meet someone or how I may meet them. I believe in happily ever after and like to hope it'll work out one day, I'm in no hurry for it to do so, just happy to hang about and see what happens...maybe that's why I'm so wary of these places and ways to hurry up such a natural occurrence. Who knows?!
So, I set about thinking about the things she put in her ad, aren't they things you're suppose to learn and discover during the dating period, the fun things to learn and try to memorise. I'm not sure if any of you (myspace friends of mine) remember but a while a go I wrote a personal ad on my myspace blog (due to friends insisting it's not right for a girl to be single and happy, so I cracked under the pressure and it also made me laugh, A LOT)...I'm sure it'll have changed a little since I wrote it but if I was going to write a hugely precise personal ad, what would I put in it and what would I forget by mistake...I think mine would read something like this:
I like my sleep but normally between 3-11am, I'm a complete night owl. I love to hate daytime tv. I adore bad American comedies that I can ridicule. I love finding spelling mistakes in magazines, papers and especially menus. I'm generally a light hearted girl and relatively easy going. I love banter, am quick witted and have a dark sense of humour. I've the table manners to eat with anyone from the Queen to a pack of wild dogs, other wise known as children. I love the little things, smells, flowers, nature, tokens of friendships, entering a warm cosy house from the cold, sparklers, photography, friends laughter. My friends and family generally come first. I love time with myself, as much as I love time with friends. I like doing crosswords alone, I hate people helping me, unless I've asked them too. I love going outside, walking in the countryside, bike rides, etc but I also adore a day on the sofa watching films and scoffing my face. I'm pretty independent, so you'll need to be so too. I can be one of the guys but don't treat me like this all the time, I am a girl after all. I love to shop for anything and nothing but I hate shopping during the sales. I love my friends and will understand and defend their actions to the skies. I find it very hard to say no, please don't test me, I feel guilty for a lot of what I don't do. I can be a bit of a neat freak. I love high heels but I generally keep them for special occasions or emotional pick me ups. I'm a cynical optimist and yes that is possible. I love dressing up, whether it's fancy dress or for dates. I love eating out and going out. I know what I like and what I don't, if I'm unsure or unresearched I'll let you know. I love going to art galleries, museums and locations with good history value. I'm generally accepting of people's opinions, I may not agree with them but I respect the right to have an opinion. I'm mac based, not pc, therefore I need it simple and straight up! I'm a fighter not a debater.
You see, I could go on but I won't...the only problem with this is that, I've spoilt the first half of getting to know someone, some of these will either be said in conversation, learnt in time or mentioned along the line...it's the whole point of getting to know someone and there is nothing better than the first fight in a new relationship, where you learn more about your than you did before.
I'd rather someone learnt this, I'd rather they didn't know some of it, I'd rather it was found out in the old fashioned sense of the world. Maybe that's why I always go for the old fashioned way and it's probably also why I don't like the idea of speed dating, dating websites, etc - I'd rather just one day bump in to someone, I like the mystery of never knowing when I may meet someone or how I may meet them. I believe in happily ever after and like to hope it'll work out one day, I'm in no hurry for it to do so, just happy to hang about and see what happens...maybe that's why I'm so wary of these places and ways to hurry up such a natural occurrence. Who knows?!
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Dancers so tiny
One of my all time favourite songs is Elton John' Tiny Dancers, yes it's a cliche song, many love it, many don't understand it and many just don't like Elton but i find it such an uplifting song, it's beat and general tune is full of hope and life, it makes me want to stand up, dance and shout from the roof tops, it makes me want to experience everything life has to offer in one huge gulp - and why? how come? what is it about that songs that makes me full of happiness? Even when I'm crying my most painful tears I sing the lyrics out loud and bright with a smile on my face.
It starts, climaxes and falls all in about 3.5 minutes, it could end there but for some reason Elton starts up again and continues for another 3 minutes, it's almost like life i suppose, just when you think you're out and done, something happens and you have faith again, not nessecarily when you need that reassuring pick me up but it always comes along, normally when you've just started to pull yourself out of your lull, as you've realised that you're the only one in control.
It also is from that most fabulous film "Almost Famous", which yes i have just finished watching, that film makes me smile and for no other reason than when it first came out, my oldest brother Julian was at uni in York and he phoned me after he finished watching to say that it was a great film and how Kate Hudson's character reminded him a lot of me - not sure if he was calling me a crazy groupie or a free spirit but i still always remember that comment, it was one of the first compliments he'd ever said to me and one of the first times I remember my brother having acknowledged me as an individual, rather than his annoying little sister.
The film also reminds me of the times I toured with the 22-20s, god I miss those guys - they were so talented, still are in fact and such incredible blokes - the friendliest, generous, caring guys, who loved having trusted individuals at hand to make them feel that some sanity exsisted during a crazy period of abnormalness. I find it hard listening to their music now a days, I find it's like listening to a dead person talk, it's an odd peculiar feeling that makes me warm with reminising, happy with fond memories and cold with the memory that it can never be again...so bizzarre.
I've had such a bizarre period in my life recently, I found happiness from within, for the first time in a while - since I clutched to straws. I feel whole again and I feel whole on my own, instead of needing someone elses reassurance.
I've discovered I've some disquiet inside me, some painful memories i wish weren't so, some amazing friends who i haven't acknowledged properly and the ability to make myself happy or sad - it's up to me and me alone.
I'd been lost for a while, since Jan or maybe April, I'd been trudging on, getting through it day by day, i had thought I was involved in life but I wasn't, I was in fact making life happen, because i needed distracting. I feel that when i need to, I'll be able to fall in love again and be able to trust that person, to not use and abuse because it's there or because they are hurting...but because they want to feel loved and be loved and because they couldn't imagine a life without me in it.
I'll find this eventually, one of my rocks from the last year summed it up best, I've just been unfortuante in life to have choosen those who are broken, needing something to lean against and hold them together, until they feel strong enough to go and fix themselves. This I believe and even though some of those haven't been the greatest and may have made me feel worthless, they've also taught me a lot of things about life and myself - isn't that the most important lesson of all?
I want to also forgive those who have hurt me, for their selfish acts and stupid actions through careless thought, I shall do so in the long run but right now, I need to make my most loved feel loved.
I am finally back to wanting to say what I've always wanted to say to people, without fear of ridicule or upset. I'm free to remind these people how special they are and to not put prices on their heads because they feel a need to justify to others.
I want to make my friends feel as lucky as i do for having them in my life. I'm a huge believer in saying things, while you can, instead of a coffin, because you didn't have the guts to say it when you might have gotten a reaction. I thank my parents all the time for having done everything they did and providing me with the childhood I had, I'm extremely lucky and I'm aware and very grateful for that, more than many would probably know.
Sorry for this drivel that started out so promising but when you are feeling happy, content and reflective, you can't help but want to share it with the world.
More cynical bullshit tomorrow. Promise. x
It starts, climaxes and falls all in about 3.5 minutes, it could end there but for some reason Elton starts up again and continues for another 3 minutes, it's almost like life i suppose, just when you think you're out and done, something happens and you have faith again, not nessecarily when you need that reassuring pick me up but it always comes along, normally when you've just started to pull yourself out of your lull, as you've realised that you're the only one in control.
It also is from that most fabulous film "Almost Famous", which yes i have just finished watching, that film makes me smile and for no other reason than when it first came out, my oldest brother Julian was at uni in York and he phoned me after he finished watching to say that it was a great film and how Kate Hudson's character reminded him a lot of me - not sure if he was calling me a crazy groupie or a free spirit but i still always remember that comment, it was one of the first compliments he'd ever said to me and one of the first times I remember my brother having acknowledged me as an individual, rather than his annoying little sister.
The film also reminds me of the times I toured with the 22-20s, god I miss those guys - they were so talented, still are in fact and such incredible blokes - the friendliest, generous, caring guys, who loved having trusted individuals at hand to make them feel that some sanity exsisted during a crazy period of abnormalness. I find it hard listening to their music now a days, I find it's like listening to a dead person talk, it's an odd peculiar feeling that makes me warm with reminising, happy with fond memories and cold with the memory that it can never be again...so bizzarre.
I've had such a bizarre period in my life recently, I found happiness from within, for the first time in a while - since I clutched to straws. I feel whole again and I feel whole on my own, instead of needing someone elses reassurance.
I've discovered I've some disquiet inside me, some painful memories i wish weren't so, some amazing friends who i haven't acknowledged properly and the ability to make myself happy or sad - it's up to me and me alone.
I'd been lost for a while, since Jan or maybe April, I'd been trudging on, getting through it day by day, i had thought I was involved in life but I wasn't, I was in fact making life happen, because i needed distracting. I feel that when i need to, I'll be able to fall in love again and be able to trust that person, to not use and abuse because it's there or because they are hurting...but because they want to feel loved and be loved and because they couldn't imagine a life without me in it.
I'll find this eventually, one of my rocks from the last year summed it up best, I've just been unfortuante in life to have choosen those who are broken, needing something to lean against and hold them together, until they feel strong enough to go and fix themselves. This I believe and even though some of those haven't been the greatest and may have made me feel worthless, they've also taught me a lot of things about life and myself - isn't that the most important lesson of all?
I want to also forgive those who have hurt me, for their selfish acts and stupid actions through careless thought, I shall do so in the long run but right now, I need to make my most loved feel loved.
I am finally back to wanting to say what I've always wanted to say to people, without fear of ridicule or upset. I'm free to remind these people how special they are and to not put prices on their heads because they feel a need to justify to others.
I want to make my friends feel as lucky as i do for having them in my life. I'm a huge believer in saying things, while you can, instead of a coffin, because you didn't have the guts to say it when you might have gotten a reaction. I thank my parents all the time for having done everything they did and providing me with the childhood I had, I'm extremely lucky and I'm aware and very grateful for that, more than many would probably know.
Sorry for this drivel that started out so promising but when you are feeling happy, content and reflective, you can't help but want to share it with the world.
More cynical bullshit tomorrow. Promise. x
Friday, September 07, 2007
Words worth indeed
I'm addicted, yep I mean truly addicted but not in the proper way, like my mate Luke would be, I mean in a rubbish way. What am I addicted too...well it's a very simple addiction - I'm addicted to words.
BUT, not in the same way others are, strange long words that mean the same as a simple word but show you've a brain and a memory, no I'm addicted to words as in Facebook scrabulous and Bella Crosswords.
Now I know what you're thinking but you can stop right there!
As a child, one of our games on holiday was to try and make words out of the number plates of the other cars, it's a simple game and keeps kids entertained for hours, especially when you're at the age of not knowing how to spell - I won many a time, as my brother had to let me win, I didn't know any better (age card always win). But I still have a habit of doing so to this day, while driving or seeing the odd sign, etc.
Scrabulous is a lot of fun. Friends you assumed would be good at it are rubbish, people who you thought would kick your arse don't, people who are just overly intelligent get non-stop 7 letters but fail at the 2, 3, 4's. etc - it's truly fabulous!!!
I'd say I'm a level pegger, some people I can beat, others anialte me and I have fun the whole time through, as I learn new words, be them all 3-5 letters but never the less, I'm using my brain power.
It's got to the point where I'm apply the number plate game to scrabble, what letters have I got, what can i spell?!
It's as simple my numberplate, is like a bad dream of scrabble tiles - VSISWZV - spell what?
As for Bella crosswords, you may have scoffed (Axl I know you will have but you'll eat your words), they are some of the most random and hard crosswords I've ever done. I took two in to work the other day, Chips and I did one each, they were pretty regular (not fashion, gossip, film, etc based, proper crosswords) BUT... recently, they've stepped up a key. It appears that in monthly cycles, the crosswords get harder and harder and then return to regular everyday ones. They are impossible!
I tried one last night, that was the cryptic bitch crossword, I've posted it below and if anyone can complete it, I commend them. I've challenge many a person to them and no one has done it yet, I even asked the fountain of knowledge on crosswords (The Mother) and to no prevail!
If you do complete it, without help of books and dictionaries, etc - send it to: Aren't you a clever dick!
Hence my desire to know more and more words and want to conquer these bastard people with there scrabble tiles and crosswords in the crappy mags. Damn them!
Crossword from hell
BUT, not in the same way others are, strange long words that mean the same as a simple word but show you've a brain and a memory, no I'm addicted to words as in Facebook scrabulous and Bella Crosswords.
Now I know what you're thinking but you can stop right there!
As a child, one of our games on holiday was to try and make words out of the number plates of the other cars, it's a simple game and keeps kids entertained for hours, especially when you're at the age of not knowing how to spell - I won many a time, as my brother had to let me win, I didn't know any better (age card always win). But I still have a habit of doing so to this day, while driving or seeing the odd sign, etc.
Scrabulous is a lot of fun. Friends you assumed would be good at it are rubbish, people who you thought would kick your arse don't, people who are just overly intelligent get non-stop 7 letters but fail at the 2, 3, 4's. etc - it's truly fabulous!!!
I'd say I'm a level pegger, some people I can beat, others anialte me and I have fun the whole time through, as I learn new words, be them all 3-5 letters but never the less, I'm using my brain power.
It's got to the point where I'm apply the number plate game to scrabble, what letters have I got, what can i spell?!
It's as simple my numberplate, is like a bad dream of scrabble tiles - VSISWZV - spell what?
As for Bella crosswords, you may have scoffed (Axl I know you will have but you'll eat your words), they are some of the most random and hard crosswords I've ever done. I took two in to work the other day, Chips and I did one each, they were pretty regular (not fashion, gossip, film, etc based, proper crosswords) BUT... recently, they've stepped up a key. It appears that in monthly cycles, the crosswords get harder and harder and then return to regular everyday ones. They are impossible!
I tried one last night, that was the cryptic bitch crossword, I've posted it below and if anyone can complete it, I commend them. I've challenge many a person to them and no one has done it yet, I even asked the fountain of knowledge on crosswords (The Mother) and to no prevail!
If you do complete it, without help of books and dictionaries, etc - send it to: Aren't you a clever dick!
Hence my desire to know more and more words and want to conquer these bastard people with there scrabble tiles and crosswords in the crappy mags. Damn them!
Crossword from hell
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Scabby Elbow!
I have a scab on my elbow, it's all thanks to The Boy deciding he was bigger and stronger than me in The Cellar the other night, so we scrapped and my elbow got scraped down the brick wall...at the time I was pretty wankered, so didn't feel it but the next day, it was all sore and gross.
Every time I touched it or put it on something it hurt...it finally scabbed over, in an impressive form, for a surface scrap, not a proper cut and a few days later, it's at that point where my scab has started to make my skin itch - I really want to pick it but I know that will start off some bleeding or pussing. Normally I'd pick it without thought but it's in an awkward place and was really irritating when I first did it, although it is starting to peel up implying that it's ready for a picking...
So basically the question is: To pick or not to pick?
Every time I touched it or put it on something it hurt...it finally scabbed over, in an impressive form, for a surface scrap, not a proper cut and a few days later, it's at that point where my scab has started to make my skin itch - I really want to pick it but I know that will start off some bleeding or pussing. Normally I'd pick it without thought but it's in an awkward place and was really irritating when I first did it, although it is starting to peel up implying that it's ready for a picking...
So basically the question is: To pick or not to pick?
Friday, August 24, 2007
You're pathetic!!!
There are certain people in this world who should grow the fuck up - they are pathetic, childish and selfish and should take a really long look at themselves, before they start treating people, who tried to be their friends, to a good old stabbing in the front!!!
Although if they grew up, they'd have to take a look at their actions and selves in the mirror and take responsibilty for everything they've ever done, how they've treated people, etc and for some narrow shouldered people, that's far to much weight to bare, oh well off to the shed with a length of rope. Put us all out of our misery, you waste of space and air!!!
How dare you think you can upset my friends? Try to upset me, that's fine but never shit on my friends, as they are kind caring and don't deserve your actions - no one fucking does!
My favourite fact is that the one person, who you claim to love is who you're shitting on most, (i hate to say this but..) he deserves it, we did what we did for him and him alone but he couldn't see the wood through the trees and foolishly followed his heart...turning his back on a loyal best friend of many years, who'd have done anything for him. The only reason I think he deserves it, is how he's treated that said friend since all your shit hit the fan...if he'd ever been a friend to him, he'd never have said or acted how he has. Being blinded by love can only be responsible for a certain amount and he excelled that, a long time a go. Poor boy will have the shock of his life, when he finally sees you for who you are!!!
If you do happen to ever want to grow up or learn from this, note two things - there is no such thing as a free hot dinner and never shit on your own doorstep!
And always remember, never get to sure or cocky, as fate has a funny way of making sure everyone gets what they deserve and your comuppence is just around the corner.
Although if they grew up, they'd have to take a look at their actions and selves in the mirror and take responsibilty for everything they've ever done, how they've treated people, etc and for some narrow shouldered people, that's far to much weight to bare, oh well off to the shed with a length of rope. Put us all out of our misery, you waste of space and air!!!
How dare you think you can upset my friends? Try to upset me, that's fine but never shit on my friends, as they are kind caring and don't deserve your actions - no one fucking does!
My favourite fact is that the one person, who you claim to love is who you're shitting on most, (i hate to say this but..) he deserves it, we did what we did for him and him alone but he couldn't see the wood through the trees and foolishly followed his heart...turning his back on a loyal best friend of many years, who'd have done anything for him. The only reason I think he deserves it, is how he's treated that said friend since all your shit hit the fan...if he'd ever been a friend to him, he'd never have said or acted how he has. Being blinded by love can only be responsible for a certain amount and he excelled that, a long time a go. Poor boy will have the shock of his life, when he finally sees you for who you are!!!
If you do happen to ever want to grow up or learn from this, note two things - there is no such thing as a free hot dinner and never shit on your own doorstep!
And always remember, never get to sure or cocky, as fate has a funny way of making sure everyone gets what they deserve and your comuppence is just around the corner.
Why won't everyone just fuck off!!!
So far today I've been rude and blunt to someone on the phone, been asked 50,000 times why I'm not going to Reading Festival, sworn a lot at many a traffic light turning red (fucking bastards), got pissed off at someone as they wanted to know if their artist was a)still at our studio and b)awake. And made a promise to myself that if I ever got the chance, I'd run over one of my best friends ex's, because he's a fucking CUNT!!!
So yes, I admit it, I am in a foul mood, really foul mood and I don't want to snap out of it, not at all, i am revelling in it and loving it, a lot!
There are many a reason to why I'm in such a horrid mood, mainly because I am tired, so tired and fed up - work and life seems never ending but this is nothing to complain about, I'm being paid and enjoy my jobs, so that's fine.
I moved house last week, am still knackered. I don't live in cardboard city anymore, which is nice but I still haven't had any time to chill and do nothing, I've had half an hour or so here or there but nothing more.
I've also had the mild stress of cleaning the old house, what fun, etc, etc, etc - the list is endless, right now it is but it'll stop very soon, which i can't wait...it's all cool.
Now to explain my being rude to someone on the phone, the guy fucking deserved it...it's so socially inept that he doesn't have a very nice phone manner and he's never thought about changing it, so in my eyes i'm doing a service to others who have to talk to him. He never says "goodbye", i mean this is basic polite conversation - what the fuck is up with that. And he also starts the conversation with "Hi it's George", as if that's going to make me fall to the floor or rush his call through sooner or do some other amazing shit, just because it's George and secondly, why the fuck doesn't he start the conversation with what the fuck he wants, rather than who it is - he's always so awkward on the phone, i hate answering the phone to him, oh so much!
The traffic lights explain themselves, bunch of conspiring motherfuckers!!!
As for Reading, if anyone else askes me why I'm not going, I'm going to simply answer "Fuck off, that's why!".
How the fuck do i know if her artist, yes HER artist is still here - i arrive at 10am, most artists don't wake until lunchtime and secondly, can i see through fucking brick? No i don't think i fucking can - so fucking phone your artist and find the fuck out!
And as for my best mate's ex, he best fucking watch out the next time he's walking along the Cowley Road, I'll happily get points to knock him flying - god being run over really is too good for him, torture is even too good for him, i hate him so much...more than anyone else...which I'll get back to later.
Right now, the one thing that pisses me off more than anything is presumptious people, i find them more rude than ignorant people - fucking cunts!!!
A few of my beliefs on often brain patterns for presumptious people:
You've done it before, so you will again and because you've done it before, you'll feel awful at the idea of saying no, so you'll do it - taking advantage, fucking cunts!!!
I'm foreign, I know I shouldn't presume but I will, as we can blame it on cultural differences and then you'll also do it, because you're too polite to say no - Cunts, fuck off!!!
You've always done it before, so I'm not going to ask if you need help or take any initivite for your sake, you obviously enjoy doing it.
I'm a cunt. I can't be bothered to take responsibilty for my actions, as I'm a cunt. I have no real friends, as I've spent my entire life lying to myself and my friends, so stand there with a pan and brush, while I shit on my own doorstep and then you can clean it up - spineless, lonely CUNT!
And my all time favourite: I'm a fucking cunt and know you're nice, so I'll deal with it, you generous foolish prick.
These are some of the cunty actions I've had of late, of absolute and utter cunty pricks who have decided to take advantage of me, because, god knows why, because I'm nice, because as long as you've never fucked me or my friends over, I'll treat you how I'd like to be treated, fuck knows but I hate them all and wish a huge selective bomb would wipe them the fuck out!
Above are a few, there are others but I can't be arsed, I'm in a bad mood but I've discovered the weirdest thing lately and I don't know where to file it, other than Limbo, which I hate as I call it a cop out. But you'll have to be a friend of mine my myspace to read that, as it's far to personal for here.
So yes, I admit it, I am in a foul mood, really foul mood and I don't want to snap out of it, not at all, i am revelling in it and loving it, a lot!
There are many a reason to why I'm in such a horrid mood, mainly because I am tired, so tired and fed up - work and life seems never ending but this is nothing to complain about, I'm being paid and enjoy my jobs, so that's fine.
I moved house last week, am still knackered. I don't live in cardboard city anymore, which is nice but I still haven't had any time to chill and do nothing, I've had half an hour or so here or there but nothing more.
I've also had the mild stress of cleaning the old house, what fun, etc, etc, etc - the list is endless, right now it is but it'll stop very soon, which i can't wait...it's all cool.
Now to explain my being rude to someone on the phone, the guy fucking deserved it...it's so socially inept that he doesn't have a very nice phone manner and he's never thought about changing it, so in my eyes i'm doing a service to others who have to talk to him. He never says "goodbye", i mean this is basic polite conversation - what the fuck is up with that. And he also starts the conversation with "Hi it's George", as if that's going to make me fall to the floor or rush his call through sooner or do some other amazing shit, just because it's George and secondly, why the fuck doesn't he start the conversation with what the fuck he wants, rather than who it is - he's always so awkward on the phone, i hate answering the phone to him, oh so much!
The traffic lights explain themselves, bunch of conspiring motherfuckers!!!
As for Reading, if anyone else askes me why I'm not going, I'm going to simply answer "Fuck off, that's why!".
How the fuck do i know if her artist, yes HER artist is still here - i arrive at 10am, most artists don't wake until lunchtime and secondly, can i see through fucking brick? No i don't think i fucking can - so fucking phone your artist and find the fuck out!
And as for my best mate's ex, he best fucking watch out the next time he's walking along the Cowley Road, I'll happily get points to knock him flying - god being run over really is too good for him, torture is even too good for him, i hate him so much...more than anyone else...which I'll get back to later.
Right now, the one thing that pisses me off more than anything is presumptious people, i find them more rude than ignorant people - fucking cunts!!!
A few of my beliefs on often brain patterns for presumptious people:
You've done it before, so you will again and because you've done it before, you'll feel awful at the idea of saying no, so you'll do it - taking advantage, fucking cunts!!!
I'm foreign, I know I shouldn't presume but I will, as we can blame it on cultural differences and then you'll also do it, because you're too polite to say no - Cunts, fuck off!!!
You've always done it before, so I'm not going to ask if you need help or take any initivite for your sake, you obviously enjoy doing it.
I'm a cunt. I can't be bothered to take responsibilty for my actions, as I'm a cunt. I have no real friends, as I've spent my entire life lying to myself and my friends, so stand there with a pan and brush, while I shit on my own doorstep and then you can clean it up - spineless, lonely CUNT!
And my all time favourite: I'm a fucking cunt and know you're nice, so I'll deal with it, you generous foolish prick.
These are some of the cunty actions I've had of late, of absolute and utter cunty pricks who have decided to take advantage of me, because, god knows why, because I'm nice, because as long as you've never fucked me or my friends over, I'll treat you how I'd like to be treated, fuck knows but I hate them all and wish a huge selective bomb would wipe them the fuck out!
Above are a few, there are others but I can't be arsed, I'm in a bad mood but I've discovered the weirdest thing lately and I don't know where to file it, other than Limbo, which I hate as I call it a cop out. But you'll have to be a friend of mine my myspace to read that, as it's far to personal for here.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Rice
Now Surely, Uncle Ben would be rolling over in his grave, if he knew the makers of his rice were making it convieniently for the microwave?
Now I suck at making Rice, it's an art form of which I can't do but I still think microwave rice is really, really wrong!!!
Now I suck at making Rice, it's an art form of which I can't do but I still think microwave rice is really, really wrong!!!
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
Yonks
It's been fucking ages since I wrote a blog last and I won't allow Axl to complain to me, so here I am typing away, just to not be whinged at, like I do he, when he hasn't emptied his brain.
So today, i didn't get an acknowledgement or thank you from two arsehole drivers, for letting them come through my right of way - fucking arseholes, how hard is it to just hold your hand up for 5 seconds - Pricks!!! These sorts of mornings are what make me believe that bird flu, is a good idea. Wipe out a large collection of the population and hope that most of those written out, are the inbreds and incapable.
The ignorance of two people and the fact that no matter which direction I drove this morning, there were 500 other arseholes all with the same bright idea, as me! I felt like I was Truman from The Truman Show, when he tries to escape and all the cars keep on pulling in front of him...although, as far as I'm aware, I'm not on a TV show, anyhow I hope I'm not, as there are things I do, that I'd hate for anyone to witness, it's why I do them in private (these things I talk about, are not sordid little things, thank you Axl). They are things like picking dry skin, my nose, plucking hairs, etc...things which are just unpleasant to see.
I'll tell you one thing, Vlad the Impailer had the right idea too. He invited all of the lame, lazy and disabled to his house for dinner one night, while they dined, he locked the doors and set fire to the place, I know it's a crazy quick solution which may not be the best way to get people off their arses and earning a wage but it is an option of sorts.
On a less mental, crazy point, than I am right now - all of which is due to my self righteousness and these two arsehole drivers. Which came first Morals or law/rules? This is one of my favourite debates to have and this coming from the girl who doesn't really agree with debating as there isn't enough emotion involved.
So today, i didn't get an acknowledgement or thank you from two arsehole drivers, for letting them come through my right of way - fucking arseholes, how hard is it to just hold your hand up for 5 seconds - Pricks!!! These sorts of mornings are what make me believe that bird flu, is a good idea. Wipe out a large collection of the population and hope that most of those written out, are the inbreds and incapable.
The ignorance of two people and the fact that no matter which direction I drove this morning, there were 500 other arseholes all with the same bright idea, as me! I felt like I was Truman from The Truman Show, when he tries to escape and all the cars keep on pulling in front of him...although, as far as I'm aware, I'm not on a TV show, anyhow I hope I'm not, as there are things I do, that I'd hate for anyone to witness, it's why I do them in private (these things I talk about, are not sordid little things, thank you Axl). They are things like picking dry skin, my nose, plucking hairs, etc...things which are just unpleasant to see.
I'll tell you one thing, Vlad the Impailer had the right idea too. He invited all of the lame, lazy and disabled to his house for dinner one night, while they dined, he locked the doors and set fire to the place, I know it's a crazy quick solution which may not be the best way to get people off their arses and earning a wage but it is an option of sorts.
On a less mental, crazy point, than I am right now - all of which is due to my self righteousness and these two arsehole drivers. Which came first Morals or law/rules? This is one of my favourite debates to have and this coming from the girl who doesn't really agree with debating as there isn't enough emotion involved.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
I want a fucking present!
So, a while ago I joined Facebook. I didn't want to but I was trying to deal with my lack of myspace and everyone and their mate kept on adding me, so I finally gave in.
Since being on there, I've gone through the hatred and dislike, I've now accepted it. I hate the fact that there is not a lot of diversity and it's all so straight looking but I also quite like it, it's a little like school uniform (although you're actually unable to identify the scabby kids, other than through their general inability to spell) and it's pretty simple to use.
I hate the fact that all of my friends can see my every move and comment - no privacy, but I like the fact that you get told when people have added new photos, etc.
I also love two aspects of it, how you know people (the most filled out, waste of time ever - I love being nosy about people's contacts. I've claimed to have hooked up with mostly everyone, which I haven't except one and that is on going currently) and also the present giving aspect, as it's for charity and makes a lovely token.
Which brings me to my point of selfishness. I want someone to give me a fucking present, it's not that much to ask. The first one is free and it doesn't take that much to dedicate a small piece of nothingness to a friend. Plus you can then buy in bulk for cheap.
I gave my first one to Bizz, as she was leaving work and I love her. I also gave Howardo a giraffe (I wish it was dressed up in clothes but never mind) as she'd been a good friend, an orchid to Vikki - as she was poorly, a pint of beer to Jon - he's great, why else?! and a four leaf clover to Emily - as she was leaving us, the dirty rotten ho-bag!
Later today, I shall shower my two bestestest friends with one each, as I love them but still no one dedicates one to me - nothing. I want to give more away, with sentimental feelings and thoughts but when I see that the people have already got one, it makes me begrudge giving them one, which is stupid but hay ho, that's the way it goes. My thought is that I adore giving presents to people and love making people smile and feel loved, so a little token that gives money to charity is always a worthy cause but I'm starting to grit my teeth and get rather annoyed by the lack of love I've received from my friends.
I know you're not supposed to give to receive but after giving so much, I want to see some returned in more ways than one!!! I know all of my friends love me, it's hard not too but some times actions/presents speak louder than words/thoughts.
And now beacuse I've complained, when I do get one, I'm going to constantly think that I only got it because I complained - fucking hell!!! This is one selfish bird signing off.
Although on another note, I was reminded last night, that I had a dream about Jaffa Cakes, yeah!!! Flucky told me that I was also muttering about dragons but I don't remember any of the dream (I do remember waking up and telling him that I'd dreamt about the cakes though), so I'm choosing to ignore that point and focus on the fact that Jaffa Cakes made it to my subconcious - fuck yeah!!!
Since being on there, I've gone through the hatred and dislike, I've now accepted it. I hate the fact that there is not a lot of diversity and it's all so straight looking but I also quite like it, it's a little like school uniform (although you're actually unable to identify the scabby kids, other than through their general inability to spell) and it's pretty simple to use.
I hate the fact that all of my friends can see my every move and comment - no privacy, but I like the fact that you get told when people have added new photos, etc.
I also love two aspects of it, how you know people (the most filled out, waste of time ever - I love being nosy about people's contacts. I've claimed to have hooked up with mostly everyone, which I haven't except one and that is on going currently) and also the present giving aspect, as it's for charity and makes a lovely token.
Which brings me to my point of selfishness. I want someone to give me a fucking present, it's not that much to ask. The first one is free and it doesn't take that much to dedicate a small piece of nothingness to a friend. Plus you can then buy in bulk for cheap.
I gave my first one to Bizz, as she was leaving work and I love her. I also gave Howardo a giraffe (I wish it was dressed up in clothes but never mind) as she'd been a good friend, an orchid to Vikki - as she was poorly, a pint of beer to Jon - he's great, why else?! and a four leaf clover to Emily - as she was leaving us, the dirty rotten ho-bag!
Later today, I shall shower my two bestestest friends with one each, as I love them but still no one dedicates one to me - nothing. I want to give more away, with sentimental feelings and thoughts but when I see that the people have already got one, it makes me begrudge giving them one, which is stupid but hay ho, that's the way it goes. My thought is that I adore giving presents to people and love making people smile and feel loved, so a little token that gives money to charity is always a worthy cause but I'm starting to grit my teeth and get rather annoyed by the lack of love I've received from my friends.
I know you're not supposed to give to receive but after giving so much, I want to see some returned in more ways than one!!! I know all of my friends love me, it's hard not too but some times actions/presents speak louder than words/thoughts.
And now beacuse I've complained, when I do get one, I'm going to constantly think that I only got it because I complained - fucking hell!!! This is one selfish bird signing off.
Although on another note, I was reminded last night, that I had a dream about Jaffa Cakes, yeah!!! Flucky told me that I was also muttering about dragons but I don't remember any of the dream (I do remember waking up and telling him that I'd dreamt about the cakes though), so I'm choosing to ignore that point and focus on the fact that Jaffa Cakes made it to my subconcious - fuck yeah!!!
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
My life Since P.A. entered.
P.A. undoubtably is Paul Askew, aka Axl.
I remember the first time I ever met Mr Axl. I was attending a roast dinner at Junction Road 90210 and there he was, along with a mixture of other people, Nell, Paul, Lex, Russ, V and Andy (plus the dog, that they'd been looking after), Mat and Hannah, Lee (Wainwright Jnr), Tim and others - can't really remember whoelse and I'm sorry if by forgetting someone I offend them, not intending to but it's hard to remember anyone, when Axl is around.
Ahh yes, Axl, you know it, Mr suck all of the attention in, move aside TV/music/radio/general entertainment, Axl is here now.
So anyway, yes that was my first proper encounter, he was rather subdued that night, if I remember correctly but it was all good.
We discovered early on in our friendship that we had equal need for: attention, witty one liners, getting a little too drunk, bitching and generally feeling mightier and better than everyone else, well because we are, of course! This brought on my excitement when ever he appeared to be around and especially when he got hooked up with the internet = myspace and blogs.
One of my favourite one liners of his was after he spilt a whole glass of wine over Lex's female friend, he exclaimed that he'd saved Lex a job, as she was already wet!!! Genius, everyone else kept their calm and didn't laugh out that loud and I was literally rolling around the floor, crying tears of salty pleasure (and no not I the boys one eyed snake sense).
He's done some nutty shit (not as in poo, as in head butting light bulbs, beer showers and standing way to close to Hootie, during drunken moments) and he's done some rather intelligent things (like dating Alex, being my friend and writing a blog).
And on Saturday night, he pushed the entertainment boundaries for me, to an all time high (this is excluding the lighbulb head butting) and is mainly towards all of the fucking comments he made and the insistency of stealing my shoes and getting an extremely eager guy to wear them, as well as giving himself a beer shower and applying a hanger to his clothing attire - he had me hooked on his every loudly spoken word. I think it's safe to say that we are two kindred spirits.
So Axl, it's not quite what you wanted (it's probably better, as it's all about you), but I promise I shall rant soon, wait for my life to stop making me happy and I'll rant away but for now, I hope my ode to you is enough.
I remember the first time I ever met Mr Axl. I was attending a roast dinner at Junction Road 90210 and there he was, along with a mixture of other people, Nell, Paul, Lex, Russ, V and Andy (plus the dog, that they'd been looking after), Mat and Hannah, Lee (Wainwright Jnr), Tim and others - can't really remember whoelse and I'm sorry if by forgetting someone I offend them, not intending to but it's hard to remember anyone, when Axl is around.
Ahh yes, Axl, you know it, Mr suck all of the attention in, move aside TV/music/radio/general entertainment, Axl is here now.
So anyway, yes that was my first proper encounter, he was rather subdued that night, if I remember correctly but it was all good.
We discovered early on in our friendship that we had equal need for: attention, witty one liners, getting a little too drunk, bitching and generally feeling mightier and better than everyone else, well because we are, of course! This brought on my excitement when ever he appeared to be around and especially when he got hooked up with the internet = myspace and blogs.
One of my favourite one liners of his was after he spilt a whole glass of wine over Lex's female friend, he exclaimed that he'd saved Lex a job, as she was already wet!!! Genius, everyone else kept their calm and didn't laugh out that loud and I was literally rolling around the floor, crying tears of salty pleasure (and no not I the boys one eyed snake sense).
He's done some nutty shit (not as in poo, as in head butting light bulbs, beer showers and standing way to close to Hootie, during drunken moments) and he's done some rather intelligent things (like dating Alex, being my friend and writing a blog).
And on Saturday night, he pushed the entertainment boundaries for me, to an all time high (this is excluding the lighbulb head butting) and is mainly towards all of the fucking comments he made and the insistency of stealing my shoes and getting an extremely eager guy to wear them, as well as giving himself a beer shower and applying a hanger to his clothing attire - he had me hooked on his every loudly spoken word. I think it's safe to say that we are two kindred spirits.
So Axl, it's not quite what you wanted (it's probably better, as it's all about you), but I promise I shall rant soon, wait for my life to stop making me happy and I'll rant away but for now, I hope my ode to you is enough.
Friday, May 11, 2007
The New Age of Peppers
While innocently shopping around Sainsbury's the other night, I stopped by some of my favourite vegetables, the peppers - they are so marvellous, well all except the green ones, poor bastards, they have got the rough end of the stick but they don't taste as yummy as the others colours.
The red ones are crisp, the orange ones juicy and the yellow ones fresh and juicy - yummy! You can prep them in so many different ways and they go with most things.
So, while pondering on which colour would look best in my Chilli Con Carne, I noticed two boxes at the back of the regular choices...One full of purple peppers and the other full of brown peppers - What the ?!
I was flabbergasted, who? What? Why? Why would you do that to a pepper?
The purple one was a really nice colour but I can't imagine that the flavours are particularly nice...I was to scared to buy them but I photographed them instead.
I bet anything that they'll produce Organic Purple and Brown Peppers next, it'll be slightly ironic if they do.
The red ones are crisp, the orange ones juicy and the yellow ones fresh and juicy - yummy! You can prep them in so many different ways and they go with most things.
So, while pondering on which colour would look best in my Chilli Con Carne, I noticed two boxes at the back of the regular choices...One full of purple peppers and the other full of brown peppers - What the ?!
I was flabbergasted, who? What? Why? Why would you do that to a pepper?
The purple one was a really nice colour but I can't imagine that the flavours are particularly nice...I was to scared to buy them but I photographed them instead.
I bet anything that they'll produce Organic Purple and Brown Peppers next, it'll be slightly ironic if they do.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Hopefully, Gabrielle was wrong and not all dreams do come true!!!
Recently, say the last month, I've been having the most random dreams.
Some were pretty tame - I was in the local pub of Drayton (the village I grew up in) with Jo and Jd is working behind the bar, the pub looks nothing like it does and was in the middle of no where but we all know it's supposed to be The Red Lion. I pop to the bar and realise that there was a wedding reception in the garden, which a beautiful river runs past, which is the only way of getting back to Drayton from here, you have to river wad (don't ask?!). After a chatting with JD and buying drinks, I return to Jo to find her talking with an ex of mine and one of his housemates (what was weird about this, was that they hadn't met at the time and they were getting on really well). My dad comes to give me a lift home and half way home, I say that my ex had offered to walk me home (through the river, which is quite dangerous but we've all done it so many times, we know where the dangerous parts are, etc. Plus this ex has offered to do anything with me in public for fucking ages, so it was quite a gesture.) and my dad turns the car around (this would never ever happen) and drops me off at the pub to walk home with the ex. This was the start of my random dreams...
In another one, I married a 40-50 year old millionaire with a ginger comb over, just for the divorce and his money. We were at the reception, which was held in a marquee that was based in the valley and stretched up 3 hills. What concerned me was that no one was asking me why I'd married him or was trying to talk me out of it, plus my dad spend the entire time complaining about the marquee being all wrong. The weirdest part was realising at the end of my dream that I might love this man but knowing deep down that I was in love with someone else.
The jumpiest of them all came a few nights ago, I was being wooed by my next door neighbour (and no not the attractive rock climber, damn shame.) the one with 3 wives and 13 kids. I was at the beach with a group of friends and we all had to climb these massive hills and twirling pathways to get to the beach and my neighbour turned up asking me for a date and then wooing me, the whole time I was thinking, I'm never going to be your 4th wife, so don't bother and then all of a sudden feeling like i was in a trance and thinking, actually your rather swoonsome...and as I thought maybe, he turned in to a Vampire and disappeared off in to the woods, at which I ran away to rejoin my friends - Lucky escape if you ask me.
The funniest one, I had this on Saturday night was that I was Nicholas Lyndhurst (yeah, Rodney!!!) and Sir David Jason (from such classics as Dangermouse, Wind in the Willows and The BFG) was making a documentary about how Only Fools and Horses became so big...all very odd. The oddest part was when my two teeth fell out (I used to get teeth falling out dreams all the time, they represent anxiety and stress), and no one seemed bothered but I went to the Dentist and he said due to my over crowding they'd fill in without any hassle, which was nice.
Once I'd sorted the teeth problem, I appeared to morph in to Sir David Jason and was chatting to Steven Fry, who was playing Compo from Last of the Summer Wine and we were discussing an up and coming project and he was trying to crack on to me, and me being Sir David Jason didn't mind at all, I was rather flattered.
Yeah, I think I'm screwed! Thankfullly last night i had no dreams, so got some proper rest, the best thing about these dreams is that they've not been to stressful, so have slept well throughout them, the worst thing is how random they've all been!
Some were pretty tame - I was in the local pub of Drayton (the village I grew up in) with Jo and Jd is working behind the bar, the pub looks nothing like it does and was in the middle of no where but we all know it's supposed to be The Red Lion. I pop to the bar and realise that there was a wedding reception in the garden, which a beautiful river runs past, which is the only way of getting back to Drayton from here, you have to river wad (don't ask?!). After a chatting with JD and buying drinks, I return to Jo to find her talking with an ex of mine and one of his housemates (what was weird about this, was that they hadn't met at the time and they were getting on really well). My dad comes to give me a lift home and half way home, I say that my ex had offered to walk me home (through the river, which is quite dangerous but we've all done it so many times, we know where the dangerous parts are, etc. Plus this ex has offered to do anything with me in public for fucking ages, so it was quite a gesture.) and my dad turns the car around (this would never ever happen) and drops me off at the pub to walk home with the ex. This was the start of my random dreams...
In another one, I married a 40-50 year old millionaire with a ginger comb over, just for the divorce and his money. We were at the reception, which was held in a marquee that was based in the valley and stretched up 3 hills. What concerned me was that no one was asking me why I'd married him or was trying to talk me out of it, plus my dad spend the entire time complaining about the marquee being all wrong. The weirdest part was realising at the end of my dream that I might love this man but knowing deep down that I was in love with someone else.
The jumpiest of them all came a few nights ago, I was being wooed by my next door neighbour (and no not the attractive rock climber, damn shame.) the one with 3 wives and 13 kids. I was at the beach with a group of friends and we all had to climb these massive hills and twirling pathways to get to the beach and my neighbour turned up asking me for a date and then wooing me, the whole time I was thinking, I'm never going to be your 4th wife, so don't bother and then all of a sudden feeling like i was in a trance and thinking, actually your rather swoonsome...and as I thought maybe, he turned in to a Vampire and disappeared off in to the woods, at which I ran away to rejoin my friends - Lucky escape if you ask me.
The funniest one, I had this on Saturday night was that I was Nicholas Lyndhurst (yeah, Rodney!!!) and Sir David Jason (from such classics as Dangermouse, Wind in the Willows and The BFG) was making a documentary about how Only Fools and Horses became so big...all very odd. The oddest part was when my two teeth fell out (I used to get teeth falling out dreams all the time, they represent anxiety and stress), and no one seemed bothered but I went to the Dentist and he said due to my over crowding they'd fill in without any hassle, which was nice.
Once I'd sorted the teeth problem, I appeared to morph in to Sir David Jason and was chatting to Steven Fry, who was playing Compo from Last of the Summer Wine and we were discussing an up and coming project and he was trying to crack on to me, and me being Sir David Jason didn't mind at all, I was rather flattered.
Yeah, I think I'm screwed! Thankfullly last night i had no dreams, so got some proper rest, the best thing about these dreams is that they've not been to stressful, so have slept well throughout them, the worst thing is how random they've all been!
Saturday, April 28, 2007
Crikey!
Golly, slightly drunken blogging is a little wrong, not only are the spelling mistakes a pain in the arse but also the lack of anything to say other than crap, it's a slight problem, which is never normally a problem, as when I'm sober, I'm more tolerant of my normal crap and once a little twatted, i get impaitent and bored of myself, I become restless and fed up and have no time for bull shit or the usual crap that I'll tolerate.
It's quite funny, I keep on correcting my spelling mistakes and keep on thinking, when I do so so, that I should leave them, as you'd all still understand. The next paragraph I shall leave badly written and typed and ignore it, even though it shall haunt my dreams and cause me many a bad nights sleep (being a perfectionist is a pain in itself), I'm slightly pissed, what do I care?
tonightm, was the first night I've gone out drinking sociailly for ages and it gelt great, so wonderful. howard left me early on as she had to attend her partner with feod anf drink, so I caried on to tthe duke for drinkies, i ended up chatting to a wonderfuyl girl called Sam, she was marvelllous and jollly good fun, i fuck,ing love new people - ph so mucj, i forgot how mych i do love new peopel - sje and i had a certain uynderstanind of wach other, which was fucking ace and really nice.
OK, I'm sorry but I can not take not correcting these spelling mistakes anymore, my skin is starting to itch and my fingers starting to twitch and my iTunes has run out of tracks, which I will rectify...now.
Anyhow, I had a small amount of money to my name but when Shot O'Clock pops by 5 minutes after you walk in the door, you know you won't need more than £20. Oh dear, Shot O'Clock did actually pop by pretty quickly, which explains me right now...it will never explain my randomness, only my family can explain that and if you don't know them, you'll never truly understand...I am a marvellous individual clone - I am my mother and my father of equal proportions, as well as own self and I can recgonise their mistakes and my own and know when to curve them and how others will react, before they've done so.
If you know my family, you'll know that we are all so different, we spend forever screaming at each other but we are all so similar that we understand the screaming and know that it's so short lived and represents our love for each other, that you may as well accept what the other is saying and scream your love back - yes I'm rambling but I love my family and how very different and how exactly the same we all are. It's as simple as you can't choose your family, so you may as well try to understand them. It'll save a lot of time and annoyance in the long run. Maybe I'm just lucky, as my family are all pretty simple and straight forward, even the complicated ones...there never has been and never will be bull shit in my family, as none of us would abide it. Which I respect and love whole heartidly.
Basically, I love being me and appreciate all of the greatness and shitness through my past, as it's all applied to make me me.
I originally had a point to make about drunken blogging, I think some how I made it but failed to make it in one, jolly good. No more drunken blogging from me!!! Promise!
Here's to the Four Tops! Yeah, they are so fucking awesome!!!!
It's quite funny, I keep on correcting my spelling mistakes and keep on thinking, when I do so so, that I should leave them, as you'd all still understand. The next paragraph I shall leave badly written and typed and ignore it, even though it shall haunt my dreams and cause me many a bad nights sleep (being a perfectionist is a pain in itself), I'm slightly pissed, what do I care?
tonightm, was the first night I've gone out drinking sociailly for ages and it gelt great, so wonderful. howard left me early on as she had to attend her partner with feod anf drink, so I caried on to tthe duke for drinkies, i ended up chatting to a wonderfuyl girl called Sam, she was marvelllous and jollly good fun, i fuck,ing love new people - ph so mucj, i forgot how mych i do love new peopel - sje and i had a certain uynderstanind of wach other, which was fucking ace and really nice.
OK, I'm sorry but I can not take not correcting these spelling mistakes anymore, my skin is starting to itch and my fingers starting to twitch and my iTunes has run out of tracks, which I will rectify...now.
Anyhow, I had a small amount of money to my name but when Shot O'Clock pops by 5 minutes after you walk in the door, you know you won't need more than £20. Oh dear, Shot O'Clock did actually pop by pretty quickly, which explains me right now...it will never explain my randomness, only my family can explain that and if you don't know them, you'll never truly understand...I am a marvellous individual clone - I am my mother and my father of equal proportions, as well as own self and I can recgonise their mistakes and my own and know when to curve them and how others will react, before they've done so.
If you know my family, you'll know that we are all so different, we spend forever screaming at each other but we are all so similar that we understand the screaming and know that it's so short lived and represents our love for each other, that you may as well accept what the other is saying and scream your love back - yes I'm rambling but I love my family and how very different and how exactly the same we all are. It's as simple as you can't choose your family, so you may as well try to understand them. It'll save a lot of time and annoyance in the long run. Maybe I'm just lucky, as my family are all pretty simple and straight forward, even the complicated ones...there never has been and never will be bull shit in my family, as none of us would abide it. Which I respect and love whole heartidly.
Basically, I love being me and appreciate all of the greatness and shitness through my past, as it's all applied to make me me.
I originally had a point to make about drunken blogging, I think some how I made it but failed to make it in one, jolly good. No more drunken blogging from me!!! Promise!
Here's to the Four Tops! Yeah, they are so fucking awesome!!!!
Monday, April 16, 2007
Bi-cycling around Oxford.
If someone had said to me 4 years ago that I'd be a bi-cycling around Oxford and loving it, I would have told them to go fuck themselves, as it turns out, they would have been right.
Since I moved to East Oxford, I discovered how truly awful driving around the city is (I already knew it but thought it might be ok-ish), also walking is fantastic fun but sometimes takes up to much time. So after discussing this very matter with my friend Emily, she offered me her old bike. One afternoon a few weeks later, a bike arrived for me, thanks to her uncle for dropping it off and so my love for bi-cycling and for Flo (full name being "The Fluorescent Wonder") began.
After a few cycle rides, I took to it like a duck to water...remembering how to use the gears and to up my ante when on a hill. I would do as I used to on hills by standing up and swaying side to side but that isn't Oxford bi-cycling etiquette, not at all. From what I can understand when approaching a hill, drop down a gear, then one should stay seated and make it look as easy as possible...which of course it is and I do all the time.
It's amazing how much of Oxford is designated to bi-cyclists. I'd never noticed being a driver, so it was a pleasant surprise to discover. There is parking and lanes for bi-cycles everywhere and it's hella good fun to bi-cycle around, especially when plugged in to a good album.
One of my favourite routes when bi-cycling, involves Longwall Street and then up Holywell Street, as Holywell is a slight relaxing pace and very pretty, I take this route everytime I cycle in to town. One of the others is the traffic lights at the High St./Longwall St. junction, over Madgelene Bridge and down to The Plain, I love racing the other bikes and the buses...love it!!! Also bi-cycling up to Summertown is beautiful and lovely to potter on around. Generally i'm well in to the bi-cycling and love being one of those annoying bastards in the way of all the traffic.
Since I moved to East Oxford, I discovered how truly awful driving around the city is (I already knew it but thought it might be ok-ish), also walking is fantastic fun but sometimes takes up to much time. So after discussing this very matter with my friend Emily, she offered me her old bike. One afternoon a few weeks later, a bike arrived for me, thanks to her uncle for dropping it off and so my love for bi-cycling and for Flo (full name being "The Fluorescent Wonder") began.
After a few cycle rides, I took to it like a duck to water...remembering how to use the gears and to up my ante when on a hill. I would do as I used to on hills by standing up and swaying side to side but that isn't Oxford bi-cycling etiquette, not at all. From what I can understand when approaching a hill, drop down a gear, then one should stay seated and make it look as easy as possible...which of course it is and I do all the time.
It's amazing how much of Oxford is designated to bi-cyclists. I'd never noticed being a driver, so it was a pleasant surprise to discover. There is parking and lanes for bi-cycles everywhere and it's hella good fun to bi-cycle around, especially when plugged in to a good album.
One of my favourite routes when bi-cycling, involves Longwall Street and then up Holywell Street, as Holywell is a slight relaxing pace and very pretty, I take this route everytime I cycle in to town. One of the others is the traffic lights at the High St./Longwall St. junction, over Madgelene Bridge and down to The Plain, I love racing the other bikes and the buses...love it!!! Also bi-cycling up to Summertown is beautiful and lovely to potter on around. Generally i'm well in to the bi-cycling and love being one of those annoying bastards in the way of all the traffic.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
007 Driving school
Now the title may startle some of you but don't let it. Basically, while driving in to Oxford earlier today, I found myself behind the car in the below image, let's forget that it's a Clio and that he had no idea about indicating or roundabouts....have a look at the name of the teaching company - 007. They've even seeked special permission to use the entire logo, including the gun but am I not mistaken, did not James Bond have a license to kill? Plus, we've all seen what he does to cars! Not the best name if you ask me.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Top 5's
If/when you visit my house, you'll discover some neatly stuck up pieces of A5 paper attached to the sitting room wall, these are our 'Top 5's', one night while bored in front of the TV we decided to do so.
It started with your "Top 5 roast dinners by accompanying condiment", mine reads -
Lamb
Pork
Chicken
Turkey
Beef.
There are other topics: Top 5 roast by meat, Top 5 Veg, Top 5 Fruit, Top 5 smells, Top 5 Famous Men (this isn't who you fancy, it could be but it's more who you admire/like), Top 5 Famous Women (same as the men), Top 5 things to do with your hands, Top 5 crisps. That's about it, we did have a list of about 20 other topics on which we were going to survey but never got round to.
My Top Famous Men reads:
John Cusack - I love him and his voice.
Anthony Hopkins - He's just so cool.
Bill Bailey - He's fucking brilliant, I love him.
Gabriel Byrne - Just look at him and he's Irish.
Frank Sinatra - Well, he just has to have been there, he's amazing, even if he was an alcoholic pill popping wife beater who had no respect for women - Have you seen the original Ocean 11's?!
The one I'd love to do, but it wouldn't be met so well with some of my housemates, as some of them do not appreciate the glory of a good swearing (weirdos!), would be 'Top 5 Swear words'. Amazingly enough, number one would not be Cunt, it would be in there but number one, above all other swearwords has to be Fuck. Was there any doubt? I do hope not, as if so, I must try harder to spread the word - literally!
I think it would read something like this:
Fuck
Cunt
Cockmunch (it's a hybrid but counts)
Shit
Bollocks
The top four are for sure, without doubt but the bottom one will probably change and morph in to other words (bugger, bloody, twat and prick, for example), variety is the spice of life. Thinking about it now, Twat may have to feature as number five, as I love saying it and calling people it and it's never meant as an insult (it's meant as a pregnant fish, lol, sorry a small in joke, in joke of our house, isn't it Miss Hamilton).
So here's to Fuck, I fucking love the word and it causes a glorious, glorious release of annoyance and stress...so when irritated over the next few days, have a swear, you know you want to.
Please feel free to add your Top 5 swear words in the comments.
It started with your "Top 5 roast dinners by accompanying condiment", mine reads -
Lamb
Pork
Chicken
Turkey
Beef.
There are other topics: Top 5 roast by meat, Top 5 Veg, Top 5 Fruit, Top 5 smells, Top 5 Famous Men (this isn't who you fancy, it could be but it's more who you admire/like), Top 5 Famous Women (same as the men), Top 5 things to do with your hands, Top 5 crisps. That's about it, we did have a list of about 20 other topics on which we were going to survey but never got round to.
My Top Famous Men reads:
John Cusack - I love him and his voice.
Anthony Hopkins - He's just so cool.
Bill Bailey - He's fucking brilliant, I love him.
Gabriel Byrne - Just look at him and he's Irish.
Frank Sinatra - Well, he just has to have been there, he's amazing, even if he was an alcoholic pill popping wife beater who had no respect for women - Have you seen the original Ocean 11's?!
The one I'd love to do, but it wouldn't be met so well with some of my housemates, as some of them do not appreciate the glory of a good swearing (weirdos!), would be 'Top 5 Swear words'. Amazingly enough, number one would not be Cunt, it would be in there but number one, above all other swearwords has to be Fuck. Was there any doubt? I do hope not, as if so, I must try harder to spread the word - literally!
I think it would read something like this:
Fuck
Cunt
Cockmunch (it's a hybrid but counts)
Shit
Bollocks
The top four are for sure, without doubt but the bottom one will probably change and morph in to other words (bugger, bloody, twat and prick, for example), variety is the spice of life. Thinking about it now, Twat may have to feature as number five, as I love saying it and calling people it and it's never meant as an insult (it's meant as a pregnant fish, lol, sorry a small in joke, in joke of our house, isn't it Miss Hamilton).
So here's to Fuck, I fucking love the word and it causes a glorious, glorious release of annoyance and stress...so when irritated over the next few days, have a swear, you know you want to.
Please feel free to add your Top 5 swear words in the comments.
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